What is Dialectical Behavioral Therapy? ( DBT for Borderline Personality Disorder Symptoms)

recently we’ve talked a lot about
borderline personality disorder and I’ve talked a lot about a specific therapy
called DB T or dialectical behavioral therapy and a lot of people out there
like what’s that how’s it help borderline personality disorder well
that is exactly what we’re talking about in this video what is up everybody this
is Chris from the rewire so where we talk about the problem but focus on the
solution and if you’re new to my channel my channel is all about mental health so
if you are somebody like me who is regularly trying to improve your mental
and emotional well-being make sure you subscribe and bring that notification
bell alright so I do a lot of videos on borderline personality disorder I
actually have an entire playlist on it and one of the reasons for that is is
that I have worked with many many many people who have borderline personality
disorder back when I was working in a rehab I still talk to some people who
have it hey you know message me for like advice or pointing them in the right
direction of resources because I’m not a therapist I’m just like yo here’s some
resources those of you who can’t afford therapy there are plenty of books out
there for one of the best forms of therapy called dialectical behavioral
therapy and like I think it’s really important to understand this therapy so
if you have BPD give it a try if you know someone who has BPD have them given
a try because here’s the thing borderline personality disorder can be
managed there is living proof of this if you look in the comments of some of my
recent videos you will see people discuss how their BPD has become
something that’s under their control and they are no longer you know having you
know these these massive relationship problems or massive life problems but
BPD is one of the most highly stigmatized disorders out there one of
the best descriptions I’ve heard of BPD is that they are like emotional burn
victims right so like a regular burn victim you touch it’s very sensitive
this is how the emotions are for someone who has borderline personality disorder
but there are things that they can do to work on these things and dialectical
behavioral therapy it’s great for a lot of people like I’ve taken some of these
lessons and from DBT and implemented them in my old life because they help a
lot of us struggle with these things even if we don’t have a diagnosed
disorder all right so one of the the first DBT skills one of the core concept
of deep eats DBT is mindfulness okay so if you know somebody with borderline
personality disorder or you are somebody with borderline personality disorder one
of the most difficult symptoms is impulse control right one of the other
difficult symptoms is emotional regulation so the emotions they flare up
right there are these extremes of emotions so you combine this problem
with emotional regulation and impulse control and it becomes a major issue one
of my favorite quotes of all time comes from Viktor Frankl he is a psychologist
who actually was in a concentration camp and he wrote a book called man’s search
for meaning well anyways one of the quotes from Viktor Frankl says between
stimulus and response there is a space in that space is our power to choose our
response in our response lies our growth and our freedom
all right so between stimulus and response there’s a space okay so when we
get triggered when our emotions go off and they flare up right there’s this
space there’s this little gap in there where we get to choose our response and
that’s what mindfulness is this is why it is such an important skill for people
struggling with borderline personality disorder because of that impulsiveness
because of you know flying off the handle this is one of the reasons why
it’s so difficult for people with BPD to hold these relationships alright but the
next skill in dialectical behavioral therapy is distress tolerant skills so
again using that emotional burn analogy right it is easy to get distress
and this is why a lot of people unfortunately don’t understand
borderline personality disorder okay like they don’t understand like just
because that same situation wouldn’t have affected you it will affect
somebody who has borderline personality disorder it is easy for them to get very
distressed and that’s where we need to have some empathy but with dialectical
behavioral therapy for borderline personality disorder one of the core
skills is learning how to get through these stressful situations whether it’s
difficulties on a job whether it’s difficulties in a relationship whatever
it is kind of like these these internal like soothing methods okay
because as anybody who has BPD or has worked with somebody or you know know
somebody with BPD that that reaction to the distress can cause some wreckage and
some difficulties like we talked about black and white thinking or borderline
personality disorder like that that intense feeling of that fear of
abandonment that can be very stressful and then it turns into this this outward
action whether it’s screaming at somebody or running away or diving into
those impulsive behaviors which are usually self-destructive whether it’s
substance abuse promiscuity sometimes its self harming behavior so DBT teaches
you how to learn how to deal with those situations all right so the next skill
of dialectical Kolbe a dialectical behavioral therapy is interpersonal
effectiveness skills okay so people of BPD it is very hard for them to maintain
relationships right whether it’s with significant others whether it’s with
friends whether it’s with family members could be co-workers could be bosses
could be could be people on the street if you work in retail maybe it’s dealing
with customers right so these interpersonal effectiveness skills they
are learning how to have healthy
communications right part of like you know the distress tolerance is learning
to step back and recognize your thoughts right what are you feeling right now is
it this fear of abandonment where is this coming from
see one of the things I love about mindfulness is so many of us are
experiencing these emotions and we don’t know what they are we don’t even take a
second to address what they are so when we work on developing that pause button
right when we pause then we can chill and have that conversation with somebody
okay because sometimes people with BPD are made to think like oh you’re just
you’re just completely out of it like you don’t even realize what’s going on
you’re always doing this right like for people with BPD not only is that
experience extremely real right but a lot of times so those feelings and
emotions are valid the problem is is that they go to this extreme and they
cause these destructive behaviors okay so although you may be feeling something
valid like if you’re in a relationship and your partner is doing some wack
stuff right like your feelings may be very valid but you’re never going to
resolve that conflict if you can’t learn how to have healthy communication
alright so the last DBT skill is emotional regulation skills
okay so I’ve discussed this in other videos like the way I look at emotional
regulation okay like is on a scale where zeros in the middle you got plus ten you
got minus 10 right so most people most people when they
experience an emotion even at its extreme right it’s it goes between zero
and like five or six right and then a negative emotion it goes from like zero
to negative five or six but one of the things that most people have due to
emotional regulation right is they’re able to bounce back and get back to that
that place that baseline alright so think of it like one of those like
Sock’em old-school Sock’em dolls with the the fan
right like with people with borderline personality disorder it’s a lot harder
to get back to that middle so it’s like hitting one of those dolls where
somebody with a a kind of normal emotional regulation it just kind of
goes a little bit and it goes back to middle right but aside from that people
are borderline personality disorder rather than hitting like a plus 5 or
minus 5 it goes to like 10 on both sides right they’re not just happy they’re
ecstatic right they don’t just get sad they’re depressed they don’t just like
somebody they fall in love something with somebody they don’t just get a
little bit upset or annoyed they get pissed okay so in DBT you learn how to
regulate those emotions and also return back to that Center that baseline even
quicker all right so if you’re somebody who struggles with borderline
personality disorder or you know somebody who struggles with borderline
personality disorder again I am NOT a licensed professional but I try to
provide people with resources what I would recommend is finding a therapist
who either a specializes in borderline personality disorder or B specializes in
dialectical behavioral therapy the the best way to find a therapist is
typically through your insurance company call them ask them if they have a list
of therapists I’m not sure if all insurance companies will say like oh
this therapist specializes in this sometimes you’ll have to get the list of
therapists then do a little research a lot of therapists have websites a lot of
them are on social media it’s 20/20 so everybody is you can also talk to your
doctor as well I’ve done some videos in the past like some people talk to their
doctors about this because there are some medications that can help with BPD
such as antidepressants anti-anxiety mood stabilizers and things like that
but your doctor might be able to recommend a therapist or a psychologist
lastly you can always try online therapy especially in this time of social
distancing I personally use an app it’s also a website called better help online
therapy I have an amazing therapist she knows all about the therapy that I
personally like which is rebt rational emotive behavioral therapy so if you
would like to try out better help online therapy there’s a link in the
description and in the pin comment and it’s an affiliate link so basically you
get affordable online therapy and a little bit comes back to help support
the channel alright anyways to share this with somebody who you think might
benefit from DBT but that’s all I got for this video if you like this video
please give it a thumbs up if you’re new make sure you subscribe and bring that
notification about and a huge thank you to everybody who supports the channel on
patreon as well as everybody who supports the channel by buying my book
set the rewired soul calm as well as the rewired soul immersed like this shirt
with my girlfriend’s adorable cat Wyatt alright thanks again for watching I’ll
see you next time

7 thoughts on “What is Dialectical Behavioral Therapy? ( DBT for Borderline Personality Disorder Symptoms)

  1. Try the online therapy app I personally use for my mental health: https://tryonlinetherapy.com/rewiredsoul

    (Using this link helps support the channel)

    Follow me on Twitter and Instagram @TheRewiredSoul



    My favorite DBT for BPD book: https://amzn.to/3beEalk

  2. I'm not able to watch this right this second but I wanted to commend you on making this video. I'm a bit of a dbt guru myself having done it off and on for the past fifteen years.

    One important thing I want to put out there since often dbt is treated as the only therapy for bpd is it doesn't work for everyone and that's okay. It is the therapy with the highest success rate in treating bpd but there are individuals like myself who have been labeled by people as just not trying hard enough since dbt kept failing me. That's just not true. It did help me alot but in the end I needed to go a different direction with my treatment and there's nothing wrong with that. Clinics offering dbt therapy here are still constantly improving on there services so its always a work in progress. I suggest every person (even those without BPD because let's be honest here dbt can benefit EVERYONE) look into dbt. It's an awesome therapy developed by a kick ass awesome woman who knew what it was like to have BPD since she herself has it.

    One thing she has said that I've found very validating since validation is such a big thing for us. Patients don't fail DBT, DBT fails the patients.

    Good luck friends.

  3. In your opinion, Is an obsession with loved ones dying an ugly cousin of fear of abandonment? I have always struggled with this fear. Is it a fear of abandonment?

  4. One of my best friends was diagnosed with BPD and this video was very informational. I appreciate the information you shared that way I could better understand my friend!

  5. DBT. Cult therapy developed by a lady that used her own experiences to base a study and then invented work sheets. I don’t think you’ve done your research.

  6. I'm 43 I have severe depression, BPD, social anxiety and I've grown up hearing about DBT but no one's ever thought to use that method with me, I've asked about it but where I live, it just doesn't seem to exist, and there isn't anyone who's specialized in that therapy, I've tried workbooks on it but to me, most of it just makes no sense, I've grown up never being allowed to talk about, feel and esp. express my emotions, so I've just gone my whole life surviving however I could, whether it be constructive or not, which most of the time it's been not constructive at all, I still deal with self injurious behavior and such. idk to me, for me, I feel this is it, this is how I am, there isn't anything more I can or anyone else can do, because it all seems pointless. I've accepted how I am and I manage, and I guess I'll just continue to manage best as I can. but I do appreciate all the info you continue to share about all this, so ya thank you 🙂

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