The Fred Movie Trilogy – The Search For The Worst – IHE
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[Wheezes] HI, IT’S FRED. [grooving music] Lucas Cruikshank, also known as… Fred, was the first YouTube channel
to hit one million subscribers back in 2009 I want to thank all of you guys
for getting my YouTube channel to a million subscribers! If you’ve never seen any of
the original Fred videos, well, consider yourself lucky. Because I regard the Fred Videos to be some of the worst content
ever produced on YouTube. It perfectly summates what
YouTube in 2009 was like. Instead of million-dollar corporations basically owning the site, like it is now, back in the day, all it took was a
stupid kid screaming into a camera with the footage sped up
so the audio got chipmunked to become a huge sensation. I’m gonna be honest, I do
remember actually enjoying Fred for a little bit when I first found YouTube. When I was a goddamn moron,
idiot 12-year-old with no taste. But I quickly came to learn how
polarising Fred actually was. I originally thought that
Fred was supposed to be this innocent child-friendly content especially because if you go to the
Fred YouTube channel today, The description reads
[high pitched voice]”I opened up the Fred channel for a bunch of cool new shows inspired
by the spirit of Fred Figglehorn including original comedy, music,
game shows, and animation.” It sounds so innocent. The Fred channel is
completely dead at this point. There hasn’t been an upload in over a year, which is probably for the best because they somehow managed
to make the channel worse than when actual Fred videos
were being made. (Jessica): Hi! I’m Jessica. (Diego): And I’m Diego! (Woman): One time your mom and dad
decided to go hang out, (Woman): and they started touching each other, (Woman): and then you popped out. The description mentions
the “spirit” of Fred Figglehorn So, what family-friendly kiddie content
makes up the spirit of…Fred? [ demonic excitement ] YAY “Fred is an internet video series centered on the dysfunctional
6-year-old Fred Figglehorn.” “Fred lives with his recovering drug-addicted
and alcoholic prostitute mother.” “It is implied that Fred has been
the victim of child abuse,” “(for example, being locked in a
dog cage for three days).” What the fuck? “Cruikshank said that people either
loved or hated Fred Figglehorn.” Well, what a perfect subject to
make a movie about, then. In 2010, Fred: The Movie
was released to critical acclaim and adoration from fans of all ages. And by critical acclaim, I mean it was widely considered
one of the worst movies of the year and was hated by people of most ages. Probably including fans. This movie was about
two years late, in my opinion, and then, by the sounds of things,
it was rushed into production for fears of Fred just being
a flash in the pan. Like it was. (Lucas): So, the whole entire
process of Fred: The Movie (Lucas): happened way faster than things
usually do in Hollywood. (Lucas): Just because I was from the internet, (Lucas): they were like “We don’t know
how long this is gonna last.” (Lucas): From my very first meeting
with their production company (Lucas): to the movie coming out
was like 10 months. (Lucas): That’s so fast. This film was a fucking
mistake from the get-go. Fred is just too simplistic
and fucking annoying to successfully make the jump
from YouTube video to full-length movie. Whoever thought this was a good
idea for a film needs to be… kicked hard in the balls. Or pussy. We’re not sexist on this show. [screams] I’m not saying a movie about Fred would necessarily always
be bad no matter what, but, come on. Let’s be real. The filmmakers who would be required
to make something like this worthwhile wouldn’t even touch this property with a shitty,
pissy, cum-covered 10-foot pole. Was anyone surprised by
this film’s lack of quality? I know I wasn’t. And being fair, Fred: The Movie isn’t… t-the worst thing I’ve ever seen… surprisingly enough there are a…couple
things about it I kind of like. I mean, if it made me non-ironically
laugh a couple times, that has to count for something. Right? But let me be clear. The bad definitely
outweighs the good here. I’m just saying, for a movie
about Fred Figglehorn, this probably could’ve been much worse. That’s not to say that this film… doesn’t make me
feel a bit sick, though. I’m just preparing you
because these movies… they do get worse. So, enough chitterin’ and chatterin’. let me introduce you
to the Fred trilogy. Starting with Fred: “The Movie” The film begins with a half-screen
computer window of our main character. Who I’m sure you’re very surprised to know is Fred Figglehorn. (Fred): Friday, Fred-day, Friday, Fre- Who I guess is video blogging
in a reference to his YouTube channel. Even thought later on, he
continuously breaks the fourth wall without it seemingly being confined
to him video blogging. He just kind of talks to the audience
when he feels like it. It’s basically the only way the
filmmakers thought they could… make this fucking stupid-ass
character work in a movie. You’ll notice his probably-trademarked
high-pitched voice is a little bit different compared
to how it was on his channel. (Fred): It’s crucial in our relationship because… [wheezes] (Fred): THIS IS AMAZIIIIIING!!!!!!!!! On his channel, the
footage is simply sped up to give the illusion of a
6-year-old with a high-pitched voice. FRED: Okay. Well, peace out, homedog. Bye! IHE: but that would be incredibly
infuriating after three seconds in a movie. So, instead, they decided to (high-pitched) pitch-shift his voice, (high-pitched) so they can keep the funny, lol high-pitched screaming Fred is so famous for. (high-pitched) [giggles] Oh, wow! So funny! (high-pitched) Wheee! Funny, funny! He goes to school where he’s not only established as being a fucking weirdo loser – like, come on, he deserves to be picked on
if he wants to wear suspenders and tuck his t-shirt
into his jeans in 2010 – but he’s also set up as being
a creepy stalker as well. [unnerving strings] The girl he’s stalking is called Judy. Played by the pop star Pixie Lott who, unsurprisingly, is fucking
awful in her debut film. (Judy): Kevin, just leave him alone! (echos):
(Judy): Just leave him alone! And she was never
in a movie ever again. Look, the plot of this movie
is not complicated. Fred wants a girlfriend. He likes Judy and wants
Judy to be his girlfriend. Judy lives next door to Fred. Funny, hilarious antics ensue. If Fred’s voice immediately grates on you to the point of infuriation
within mere seconds, which, let me clarify, I cannot blame you for. ♪ Fire burning on the dance floor ♪ ♪ Whooooah ♪ then these movies will basically
be insufferable for you. You will not be able to finish them. But for some reason, the voice
doesn’t really get to me. I think annoying characters
can actually be quite funny. When they’re done right. Maybe I’ve just seen
so much shit at this point that I’ve built up an immunity
kind of like a callus on my fucking brain. When this film is at its best, it kind of reminds me of a
live-action SpongeBob SquarePants. They’re both weirdo losers
who have annoying voices, and they both have comedy that
revolves around quite random, ludicrous surreal and physical comedy. Except the good episodes of SpongeBob
have a bit more leeway because…it’s a cartoon. Which doesn’t have the restrictions
of filming real-life people, so it can fully embrace the weirdness. And to its credit, SpongeBob
actually has…punch lines. (Patrick): You took my ONLY FOOD. (Patrick): Now I’m gonna starve! And enjoyable stories. That are fun, goofy
distractions for 20 minutes. You do realise quite quickly that Fred
doesn’t have much variety in terms of how they
play him for comedy. There are two types of
punch line in the Fred movie. He either screams, [ gunshots ]
[ screams ] or falls over. That’s it. After you’ve heard him scream once, or get hurt once, it quickly starts to get stale. Pulling off comedy – that is actually funny – in a movie is not an
easy thing to active. Ideally, you kind of want to structure it
almost like an action movie. You don’t want the best part of your movie
to be the opening scene or first act, so then everything after it
pales in comparison and leaves you wanting more of
what you’ve already had. You don’t want to blow your wad too early. You’ve got to drip-feed just
enough entertaining antics until a climax near the end
that leaves you satisfied. Now, of course, when you only have
two types of punch line, two types of fucking joke, and SUCH a simplistic story, you can’t really do that. So, the Fred movie becomes
extremely predictable, not only in terms of
the paper-thin plot, but also how every single scene
is going to conclude in terms of comedic value. Let me show you an example of a scene that falls
completely flat in terms of comedy. And isn’t the least bit funny at all. Fred says him and Judy are inseparable. (Fred): I’m taking things to the next level with Judy. (Fred): We’ve been inseparable lately. Which is obviously a lie,
because we’ve already seen that she might as well
not know that Fred exists. So, Fred is obviously completely deluded. So, I guess being deluded is funny. Then we cut to a hallway shot where
Judy says she might host a party. (Judy): So, I was thinking of having
a party this weekend. While Fred eavesdrops
and gets ignored by them. Then he bumps into someone and says, “Ow”. (Fred): Ow! IHE: So, what part of that is
supposed to be funny, exactly? The fact that he’s a huge loser? Who nobody likes? Why is that funny? It’s just sad and a bit pathetic. There is one joke I can remember that actually
has a setup and punchline. And made me laugh because
I wasn’t expecting it. Fred tries to get into Judy’s house
by concocting a plan to get over the wall in his garden because if he tries to go
through her front door, his neighbour called Kevin, who’s a bully, and also happens to be Judy’s
girlfriend, sort of, will kick his ass. [moans] So, first he tries to use
a trampoline to jump over, but that doesn’t work. So, instead, he starts digging a hole. When he finally manages to
dig a tunnel underground and emerge from the mud like a zombie, this happens. (Fred): Oh, my gammit,
I dug all the way to China! [screams] It’s not amazing or anything, and the scream is a
cop-out way of ending it and securing a laugh from
the 8-year-old Fred fans. But that is an actual joke
in some respect, at least. On the flip side of that, there’s
this fucking weird joke that’s set up very early on where Fred explains how his friend got lost in the woods
when he was young. And this is the reasoning for why
he’s scared of the woods. Whatever. Makes sense. Later on, of course,
he winds up in these woods. And the character who got lost
in his childhood shows up and looks like a homeless person. [ unnerving music ]
(Lost Guy): It’s me! Evan! Then Fred screams. And runs away. And that’s it. Where-where’s the joke? Fred screaming is actually justified here
because this is creepy. I think I would scream like Fred if I saw this guy
in the middle of the woods. It has absolutely no point and isn’t funny. So why is it in this fucking movie? You could take this
entire part out of the movie and not a single fucking
thing would change. So, hold up. Let’s rewind a bit. The first 10 minutes of this movie are basically a painfully
boring Fred YouTube video. It’s intentionally edited like his videos in the scenes where he’s directly
addressing the camera. So, already, this film doesn’t
do itself any favours. You want your movie to feel like a movie. Not a… YouTube video. A significant chunk of this film are these
bizarre imagination scenes. Where Fred is basically daydreaming
something that he thinks is happening. But once they’re over, they didn’t
actually happen at all and were completely pointless. Kind of like that film
The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, but except here the film isn’t shot well and these scenes aren’t entertaining and
serve no purpose to anything. I guess if they were funny
I could forgive them, but they just become irritating because
you know nothing is actually happening in this universe to develop
or advance anything. At the start of this scene where
Fred is concocting his plan to basically trespass into Judy’s house, We’re introduced to this
character called Bertha. She’s probably the best
thing about this movie. She’s kind of like a budget
Scott Pilgrim character without the sublime writing
and direction of Edgar Wright. She does become relevant again later,
so don’t forget about her. She’s…she’s very important
to the plot of… Fred: The Movie. (Fred): Dad? (Fred): What do you think I should do? So, yeah. John Cena
is randomly in this movie. He plays what Fred
imagines his father who abandoned him when
he was young as being like. He’s honestly pretty great. [smash] It’s nice to see Fred being
assaulted a few times. Even knowing that it’s
not happening in this universe. (John Cena): Yeah! My house! IHE: And this was pre-meme as well, so it’s not like this was pandering
to the internet crowd. They just somehow managed
to pay John Cena enough to get him to show up for a couple
of hours in this trash movie. One thing I do kind of appreciate
is the break-neck pace this film has. One of my biggest complaints
with films in The Search For The Worst is when a boring, bad film meanders
and doesn’t fucking go anywhere. With scenes that just never
seem to fucking end. There’s a scene in this movie where
it seems like it’s about to go into a full-on five-minute song and dance number, but it just kind of stops after
10 seconds and moves on. Before it has the chance to
get truly insufferable. It is kind of a back-handed compliment, but thank you for that. Something I don’t appreciate, however, is the worst fucking character in any of these Fred movies. Fred’s mother. Who is played by this
woman who is so awful, it actually makes Fred look like a funny
and likeable character in comparison. (Fred): Sorry. (Fred): You’re strong.
[laughs nervously] (Fred’s Mom): Fred, what’s going ON in here?? (Fred): Mom! I thought- IHE: She’s clearly only here for a paycheck, but she’s chewing the scenery to such a… ridiculous extent that it becomes more annoying than Fred, it becomes MORE annoying than Fred. [Exhales annoyed] So, fast forward to the part where Fred tried to dig underground
and that all failed. He decides to dress up as a woman and finally manages
to get over to Judy’s house where a terrible secret is revealed. (Fred): Oh, my gammit!
Asian people kidnapped Judy! Okay, okay. So, she wasn’t actually
kidnapped by Asian people. Fred is just a…
Fred is just a moron. She’s actually just moved house. (Fred): Judy moved?! (Fred): Where to?! Fred’s mum gives him the new address and he has a strop like the
insolent child he is. [screams] This scene goes on for about a minute. Yep. A full minute. Of this. Are you enjoying this? Ha. I know I am. I’m dragging this on as long as possible
just so you know – just so you can get a tiny taste – of what the fucking pain is like. Once he’s jerked off and
removed some of that angst, he checks where Judy lives on Google Maps. So he can continue
to be a creepy stalker. (Fred): I wonder what Judy’s house looks like. If I zoom in, I wonder if I can see her. [gasps] Ew! [ canned laughter ] The themes in Fred are
actually extremely strange. And in another movie could be played for a
completely different effect and tone. Like, just take a second to think about this. Fred is a weird loner outcast
who no one likes, gets bullied, he talks to himself and imagines
people who aren’t really there when he’s alone, has anger issues and is
clearly unstable mentally, has no father figure and
was raised by an alcoholic who’s also a prostitute. Oh, and he’s also a stalker
who is deluded to the point where he thinks the hottest
person in school is his girlfriend despite her wanting
nothing to do with him. (Fred): She’s my girlfriend. (Fred): Obviously. And all of this is played… for laughs? Despite its dark nature? And no, this is most definitely
not a dark comedy. It’s a by-the-numbers, American high school, made for Nickelodeon family-friendly affair. Like Spongebob, for example, is also a weird, awkward loser. But he’s also a cartoon sponge who lives in a pineapple under the sea. So, like, who cares about that? We understand that it’s supposed to be ridiculous. But when it comes to Fred, it’s just weird and creepy! And the entire idea becomes more and more disturbing, as you put the pieces together. And really, think about it. God, (breathes in) i-it really doesn’t make me feel well.. [war sounds] …this film is just a Youtube video with somewhat of a budget. It’s unbelievable. So off Fred goes to Judy’s house. I don’t know why he didn’t just get a lift from his mum, but whatever, we have to have a movie I guess. He tries to take the bus but fucks up massively and gets on the wrong one. He has an incredibly weird scene with his imaginary friend. (Lucas): If you’ve endured the pain that is the Fred movie franchise… Then winds up at a water park. Bertha from earlier is there for some reason, And she buries Fred in sand, I guess, So they have something funny to put on the poster. Then he eats a fly. It’s all very strange. He keeps saying, “Oh my gammit”, [Fred] Oh my gammit… [Fred] Oh my gammit! It’s even on the box, as if it’s this classic catchphrase or something. I guess it’s a combination of “Oh my God” and “Dammit”. Doesn’t really roll off the tongue, does it? “Oh my gammit”. (Fred screams) The next five minutes are a couple of random, unfunny, scenes that mean nothing, and have no real point. Fred stumbles across this Mexican fellow who exclaims how Fred has a fucking annoying voice. It is kind of funny how this film has a little bit of self awareness about how annoying Fred is, But then again, at the same time, just acknowledging that the thing is a thing, and then doing nothing clever with this newfound self awareness, isn’t exactly clever. We all know that Fred is annoying. (Fred): I’m craving them; my veins need meds! Did I also mention that water is wet? He finally arrives at Susan’s [Judy’s] house, ♬ because he can’t be alone tonight… ♬ Oh yeah, and don’t pay attention to the fact that he’s holding a dog now. I completely skipped over that scene. And I’m sure whatever you’re imagining in your head as to how he acquired this dog, is much funnier than how it happens in the real movie I can assure you on that one. (Judy): *Gasps* [Judy] It must have been so hard! *Daydream exit sound* Oh, it’s another, “This didn’t actually happen” scene. Great. Do you see how repetitive and dull this gimmick gets now? You know, I… I really… I’m really not feeling very well. Talking about this film is making me feel… really weird. Ugh. So Fred gate crashes Judy’s party, and embarrasses himself in front of everyone. [Party] OHHHHH (Fred): Hello. Judy basically buckles under the peer pressure of her cunt friends, and continues to be the shallow bitch that she is. (Judy): Maybe you shouldn’t be here. (Judy): Judy… Everyone there finds it so “awk” and “cringe”, that all these pricks pull out their 2010 iPods, And record the OMG moment to post on their facebooks and share with all their friends. Kevin goes as far as to squish some pizza, or toast? Or something? On Fred. Then Fred projectile vomits onto Judy for some reason. I guess it’s just to make the scene that much more “teeth-gritting emoji”. Maybe even with a hint of “blushing with eyes wide emoji”. [vomits] After Fred runs out of the house, Judy follows him out and yells “Fred! Fred!” (Judy): Fred! Fred, wait! Implying she kind of cares that she upset him, despite never acknowledging him before? What? Once poor little old Fred gets home, he’s terrified to discover that his stupid puke ass has wound up in multiple cringe compilations on YouTube. (Fred): Gosh, why do people even watch other people on YouTube? (Fred): It’s weird, it’s creepy! This movie seems to understand and embrace the fact that it’s shit, and a bad idea. Why else would it be constantly referencing how annoying Fred is, and directly jabbing at the audience who this movie is actually aimed for? It’s a shame they didn’t fully embrace the contempt they clearly have for Fred fans a bit more. But I guess I’ll take what I can get, I suppose. All right, it’s time for the funniest scene in the whole film. Because Fred is so upset about not being invited to Judy’s party, he writes a bunch of “anti-invites”. (Fred): I’m gonna have a party, and no one’s gonna be invited. Telling all the twats from his school that they aren’t invited to his rockin’ party that he’s gonna have. It’s just such a ridiculous idea that I find it kind of amusing. Fred is filled with so much bitter hate, and genuine resentment, That there is something oddly satisfying about him going around, getting what his own idea of revenge is. (Fred): You got my message that you’re NOT INVITED TO MY PARTY! However, once Fred arrives at Bertha’s house, things go a little bit differently than how he planned. He hands her a dis-invite, and she’s all like, (Bertha): I didn’t think that video was funny. so Fred decides to actually invite Berta to the party for real, And they have a great time partying. It’s filmed in a weirdly sexual way for some reason, And they’re only recording it for the spiteful reason of making every jealous who was dis-invited. But despite that, let’s give this film credit for what they’re doing here. After abandoning the shallow and cunty Judy, Fred finally realised that the companionship he was after all along was there where he least expected it: in the equally alternative character, Bertha. Man, you know what, I guess we shouldn’t always judge the book by its cover, huh, Fred? (Fred): THIS IS AMAZING! Thanks for teaching me a great lesson, Fred. Boy, am I glad this movie did end up having a… a point. And a message. For kids. That’s actually… pretty admirable. There is like, ten minutes, of running time left though. I wonder if it’s possible to… fuck this up in some way. (Girl): Oh, it was an epic fail of me not to go to Fred’s. (Girl): Epic Fail. [fart sound effect in background] (Guy): I was at Fred’s house, and we like, hurled together. [long fart and “FUCK YOU” sound effect play repeatedly during the dialog] (Fred): Judy. (Judy): I wanted to see if I could… can I come in? (Fred): Just hold on one second… [scream of joy] [Fred] Won’t you come in? [Judy] Thank you. What? N-No. Heh. No. *laughs* No, no no no… Everything had been set up to make sure that, It would make no sense for Fred to actually wind up with Judy in the end. Not a- not a single thing about this happening makes… makes any fucking sense. Nah, nah nah nah. Fred. *Eerie music in background* Why’d you do this, Fred?! You’ve ruined everything you possibly could. In one swift motion, Every single bit of credit I had given you… is now void. It’s now void! This movie has no point anymore. This movie’s got no fucking point. There is no message. The Fred movie has no message anymore, it was right there! The message now is that… if you stalk the hot girl… and basically manipulate your classmates through shallow and empty means, You’ll come out on top in the end. Be a terrible person! Be a fucking shallow person! That’s a… that’s a great thing for kids to learn! Be a selfish, shallow piece of shit! Yeah, yeah, what a great message. Oh yeah, and remember when Fred zoomed in on the house, and saw that guy on the toilet? Well, right at the end it’s revealed Fred’s mum fucked him. And that’s actually… Fred’s dad. His real dad, not John Cena. I am not joking. (Fred’s Mom): Hey, I know that guy… (Fred’s Mom): It’s Danny Genetti. (Fred’s Mom): We had a date once. (Fred’s Mom): That was about, I don’t know. 15 years ago? (Fred): I’m 15. What is happening? Who wrote this? This story should have written itself, all the pieces were there. I was giving you credit, Fred: The Movie. I was giving you credit. It wasn’t anything special. But it wouldn’t have been as insulting, at least. Oh, God, my blood pressure. I… I can’t deal with this. (music gets tenser) Oh… Fuck… Please, Fred!! You’re fucking killing me here, Fred!! *cough* Oh… Oh no… Oh, fuck no… I can’t take this, Jesus Christ!… [heartbeat monitor] (Ralph): You awake? (IHE): What? (Ralph): It’s aight, dude! [idk] (IHE): What? What the fuck is going on? (Ralph): Doctor said you had a seizure. (Ralph): I don’t know what from. (Ralph): Told me to ask you… (IHE): So, I guess I’m in a hospital? (Ralph): Yep. (IHE): Oh, God, you don’t understand. I… (IHE): I’m only a third of the way through. (Ralph) What’s the last thing you remember? (IHE): A movie… (IHE): Fred… (IHE): It was the movie Fred: The Movie. (Ralph): Well, you’re done watching it, so you should be okay now. (IHE): No, no. You don’t understand, there are two more. (Ralph): Two more?! (Ralph): What, do you want to fucking die? (IHE): Wait, hang on. (IHE): Why don’t you… (IHE): …cover the second movie for me, while I recover. (Ralph): Are you gonna pay me? (sad piano music) Now, before we start, I have to say. I know some of you are going to watch this movie… simply because, we watched it. So, if you do decide to watch it, I just want to make sure you’re safe about it. Please, use protection. If this movie’s going to fuck you up the ass, then at least make sure it doesn’t make you sick. And just remember, if you don’t want to watch the Fred movie, You don’t have to. I do, however. (Fred): Hey hey, It’s Fred! (Daniella) And Daniella! (Fred): And this is it! The world premiere of my brand new movie, Fred 2: Night of the Living Fred! By now, you’re probably accustomed to the awful editing, ‘Cuz it’s funny to constantly change positions, you know? Like, you can’t just say something funny. You… have… to… constantly… move… around… the… fucking… room… ‘cuz it’s funny. (Fred): You’ll be scared, and scarred! [From how bad the movie is] (Fred): Scar-rared! By the way, despite this being called “Night of the Living Fred,” it has nothing to do with “Night of the Living Dead.” There are no zombies in this film, so I don’t know why they called it “Night of the Living Fred,” other than to work in, like, a clever pun. But it’s not a clever pun, it’s just “Night of the Living Fred.” Like, “Shaun of the Dead” is a funny title, because it’s about zombies, and “dawn” rhymes with “Shaun”. This could easily be “Night of the Living Ralph,” Or “Night of the Living Alex” Or “Night of the Livi-” (Mr. Devlin): Hello-ski! So they introduce this guy, and this guy is the antagonist of the film. Fred’s assumption is that he is a vampire, So Fred has to kill him. (Mr. Devlin): Gammit. But I think there’s something else going on with him. Something a little more… (Mr. Devlin): You know, I was worried you might not show up. (Mr. Devlin): But I’m glad you did. (Mr. Devlin): I have a special meal plan, that I’m very excited for you to try. (Mr. Devlin): It’s a food I’m sure you’ve never eaten before. …child molester-y. Ariel Winter is also in this film, For absolutely no reason. [swoosh sound] [ding sound] Did a guy who edits fuckin’… wedding videos edit this film?! (Fred): You remember Judy, right? (Judy): (choir-like voice) ♬ Freeeedddd ♬ (Fred): Yeah, What the fuck? (Fred): Dumped her. (not-Judy): Don’t go, Fred!… (Fred): I’m sorry, Judy, but I can’t be tied down. [engine motor] (Fred): Here’s lookin’ at you, kid. Really topical humor, Fred. You think any kid watching this knows what Casablanca is?! And even if they knew what Casa Blanca was, what’s funny about that joke? Oh wait, hold on. The condom’s full. See, like, this one is already full. So we gotta break out another one. Jesus, that’s a lot of fuckin’ cum. When disposing of condoms, tou gotta be- Oh, shit! …careful to make sure- oh! Easy now. Make sure that the… That… Fred Figglehorn’s little juices, Don’t get everywhere. So, gettin’ back on topic, The actress who played Judy clearly had no interest in being in the sequel. (Lucas): Have you ever wondered why Pixie was only in the first Fred movie? (Lucas): Her management wouldn’t let her do the other ones. So, they just used the old “we broke up” excuse. [Fred] We broke up. They couldn’t even get the actress to do this scene? Just a small cameo? So, instead they put this… husk of a man in a wig. It’s just sad. So, they just recast Ariel Winter to play the same part, The love interest that isn’t really the love interest, ‘Cuz Bertha is the love interest. And they recast her as well. (Bertha): Why did he have an umbrella in the day time? [Fred] I don’t know. If I knew, I wouldn’t be scared, now would I? Oh yeah, we were talking about the editing. Awful transitions and freeze frames with text. This is Talia, DING Insert stock sound effect here, DING And then they show the cool kid. And the cool kid has a “K” hat, and a “ME” shirt. And I was pretty popular in high school, I mean, if you can’t tell already, I was really popular in high school. And I always walked around with a really cool “R” hat, you know. And I had a cool shirt that said “ME” on it, just to show everybody how cool I was. (Talia): I made you – (Ralph): Methamphetamine (Talia): – In chemistry class. (Fred): (Laughs) (Ralph): All right, this movie’s about to go in a really different direction. Ralph: Of course, that isn’t really what she said, ‘cuz… this movie doesn’t wanna offer me anything with any comedic value. But see, wouldn’t that be an interesting route to go? The guy who plays Fred hates this character And he hates that he’s done this. He only did it for the money. So how about the guy who plays Fred, I think his name is Lucas? Make another Fred movie, except Fred is, like, a heroin addict, And he becomes like a… a male escort or something. Requiem for a Fred.
(Dramatic Music) For all I know, maybe that’s what Lucas wants to do. Maybe these awful movies aren’t his fault. Maybe he had no creative input all all and it’s just the product of a bunch of talentless and soulless businessmen who wanna make some really bad kids’ film. Maybe… in real life, he’s actually pretty funny. Turns out that he actually has a YouTube channel, which he has complete creative control over. So let’s take a slight detour, and look at his incredibly original, talent filled, fun, funny, (deep thought) Let’s do this again. So let’s take a slight detour, and look at his… Channel. (Lucas): Now watch me whip, (Lucas): Now watch me nae-nae (Lucas): Now watch me whip, whip (Lucas): Watch me nae-nae. [I’m so sorry] (Lucas): Break your legs, now! Break your legs with it! (Lucas): Break your legs with it! There’s your answer. These movies are completely his fault. He either has no talent or he doesn’t care. (Lucas): Also be sure to give this video a thumbs up, let’s try to get to 25,000. (Lucas): If we get to that goal… (Lucas): Princess Diana will be president! (Lucas): Yeah… Hooooly shit… (Lucas): The weird thing is, is I don’t remember filming that. (Lucas): I’m trying to, like, go back in my mind, and, like… (Lucas): what was it like to film at a grocery store while it was open, (Lucas): and act like a psychopath? (Lucas): I feel like whenever I do Fred, (Lucas): whenever I did a video, like, I just would black out. That’s usually what happens to people when they go through some… …traumatic experience… their brain tries to repress it, erase it from their minds, like when I was a child. …and I had an uncle… …and he was a nice guy… …seemed like a nice guy… …got me gifts… …took me to Chuck-E-Cheese, but then one day… …he took me to his car… …and said “Ralph, let’s play the… …No-Clothes game”… …for every slice of Chuck-E-Cheese pizza you eat… …take off an article of clothing… …so I took off my shirt, and my pants… …and he said “more”… …”more”… …and then he took me in the backseat… …and he took out his ding-dong, and said… (deep breath) …”Y’know how you play Whack-A-Mole?… …Do it again… …just… …just do it on my ding-dong this time.” But anyway, I’ve repressed that, so it’s totally fine. So then Fred’s alcoholic mother answers the door, and it’s the Progressive woman. (Fred’s Mom): Janite. (Progressive Woman): Hilda, what a fun outfit for relaxing at home. Fuckin’… Meryl Streep x2 over here. (Fred’s Mom): Since your father left me, it’s been up to me to raise you on my own. (Fred’s Mom): And believe me, I’ve enjoyed every minute of it. (Fred’s Mom): But with that comes a lot of sacrifice, (Fred’s Mom): and part of that sacrifice is not gettin’ invited to a lot of parties! Yeah, it’s okay, just only do one take. It’s not like her line delivery was awful or anything. Don’t bother with the second take; making movies is hard, and we gotta save time and money. Just do one take for everything, it’s fine. Then the best character in the movie comes out, (John Cena): This cottage cheese is also wrong. Throw it out. John Cena is honestly great in this movie, God bless him for doing this. (John Cena): You can’t see me! (Fred): Yeah, I can. (John Cena): All right, what do you want? Aw man, look at all that V8 and SunnyD! Yeah, have some SunnyD, dude! SunnyD is the shit! Drink that shit all the time when I’m hanging out with the ladies in my cool R hat and ME shirt. Pickin’ up some Cherokee chicks on the trail of beers, y’know what I’m saying? (Fred): What is going on around here?! (Fred starts singing) No!… [Ralph groaning] [gun loading] [loud gunshot sound] (Old Lady on Pancake): I need you to be careful of him; (Old Lady on Pancake): he’s more than a music teacher. (Old Lady on Pancake): He’s EVIL! See, these are the scenes I genuinely enjoy in this movie… …when it just gets really weird and experimental, I enjoy that stuff. [Fred screams] See, that scene is amazing. And then we get back to this crap. (Mr. Devlin): The day is up, Fred. How far into this movie are we? No way. I feel like I’ve been here for two fuckin’ days. All right, I was trying to save this till at least, like, ninty minutes into the movie, but I guess I can’t. I can’t fuckin’ take it anymore. [Fred 2 plays in the background with sad/ominous music overlayed and Ralph vigorously drinking] (Fred): You can tell someone’s a vampire because they can’t go in direct sunlight, (Fred): they can’t see their own reflection, (Fred): and aside from crosses, (Fred): they don’t like silver- Whoa, whoa, hol…hold on a second. Go back to the…the last image. I wonder why they put a picture of Adolf Hitler. This is very odd. This is a very odd choice to do that. So Fred is eavesdropping on his mom’s date with Mr. Devlin, who he assumes to be… a vampire, meanwhile he’s actually a child molester, and his girlfriend goes to, like, spy on them by dressing up as a waitress… (Mr. Devlin): You look… just like a girl in my class. Y-You look like a kid in my class, turn around and take off all your clothes, then I’ll know it’s you. (Mr. Devlin): I guess I sucked the life out of those kids, huh? Oh, no, stop!… (laughing) Don’t suck the life out of these kids… (Bertha): I think he said he’s gonna suck the (bleep) out of the kids. Oh, God, now these jokes are gonna start. (Fred): You should keep an open mind, sir, because you might learn something from me. (Fred): I can make ANYTHING taste good. (Guy): Oh, yeah? (Guy): What about my sock? Who…like, who’s that guy? Where is he in the scene? We go from these two people talking, and then they just cut to this random dude, who’s probably not even on set the day they shot that scene, and he’s just like (in stupid voice): Eh, hurp-da-derp-ee-derr! (Mr. Devlin): I had a lovely time. (Fred’s Mom): Do you wanna come in for a cup of coffee, tea, ME?? Sorry Mrs. Figglehorn, Mr. Devlin likes ’em a little… younger… y’know? Young enough so that they can’t taddle on ya. (Mr. Devlin): I have some things to do tonight, and tomorrow it’s… [pop sound] Oh, ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho, no… (Fred’s Mom): He’s a nice man, Freddy. (Fred’s Mom): He’s very interested in you. (Fred’s Mom): (slowed-down) …very interested in you… (Fred): What makes you think we’d give you any of our (bleep), Mr. Devlin?! (Mr. Devlin): For the (bleep) drive. (Mr. Devlin): I’m gonna get a pint of (bleep) from each of the kids. (Mr. Devlin): Kevin gave a pint this morning. (Mr. Devlin): He’s giving the gift of life to someone who needs it. I’m not exaggerating it, right? Like, this movie has a lot of sexual themes in it. (John Cena): You’re gonna suck his (bleep). (John Cena): Suck his (bleep) before he sucks yours. (John Cena): Grab his head like this, (John Cena): turn his neck sideways like this! Oh, my God. (Fred): Please… (Fred): come… (Mr. Devlin): Heh, heh… [Fred scream] [slowed-down Fred scream] [slowed-down earrape Fred scream] Oh, my God, is he gonna hang himself?! So Fred, like, ties himself to… a thing… and he goes out the window and tries to eavesdrop on Mr. Devlin… …and then he falls out the window and dies. And then the movie ends. Once again, this is a very odd choice by the director. I wonder why he chose to end a kids’ film like this. (Fred): Dad! (Fred): I need your help. (John Cena): Well, that’s no coincidence, son, because I need your help. And then, for no reason, we cut to this scene. This scene has nothing to do with anything. They just wanted to through it in the movie, because they thought it was funny. They actually had Fred go out during a WWE match… I feel so bad for everyone involved in this; it’s so embarrassing. Didn’t even need it in the movie; it’s not funny, or interesting… (Fred): …and took over! (Fred): Now I have to take him on all by myself. [deep breath] (Fred): First… Here goes the editor again. (Fred): …I’ll need a cross. (Fred): A really big cross! …now… …I’m… …going… …to do… …dissolves… …’cuz I’m an amateur. Who the fuck edited this movie? I’ve seen pornography edited better than this. There he is, Ned Bastille. (Fred): I need a woman who’s going to challenge me a little more. [swoosh sound] [swoosh sound] Wha… what was that?! Oh, Ned. You incompetent bastard. Hey, Ned. Here’s today’s footage. Can you edit it by tomorrow? Why, of course I can! Guess what, guys, a fan favorite is back, and his name is… Durf. (Fred): Durf! (Fred): What are you doing here?! (Durf): (in slowed-down voice) There’s a question already on the table. (Fred): Oh, I’m using this cross against the vampire. This movie is like a fuckin’ carcinogen. I can feel the – the tumor… growing in my head. Oh, my God. He’s gonna shoot up the school. What the fuck?! This is gonna be like “We Need to Talk About Kevin”. There we… there’s another title for you! “We Need to Talk About Fred”. Don’t worry, Talia; I’m here to protect you! [screaming and water pistol sounds] (Progressive Woman): Fred! Fred, stop it! (Progressive Woman): Please, Hilda, do something! (Fred): I hope it’s not too late, Mom… (Fred’s Mom): Fred, stop! (Fred): …I hope it’s not too late… (Fred’s Mom): I’m sorry, everybody! Fred has serious psychological problems. (Fred): What?! [long scream] [smashing sound] He walked into a school… with a gun… filled with garlic water, and shot at the entire audience. But he goes back to school the next day. No suspension, no police, no nothin’. (Kid): It’s a flying vampire bat! (Other Kid): Better protect yourself with garlic! [scream] (Fred): Get away! (Mr. Devlin): Everyone, stop! (Mr. Devlin): Diesel, put that away. Everyone to my office, we’re gonna play a game of… musical chairs. Except I’m one of the chairs. So Mr. Devlin takes him on a tour, and Fred livestreams it, and everyone watches in horror. (Kid): You watching this? (Other Kid): It’s so scary. Not ‘cuz they think he’s a vampire, but for… other reasons, y’know? Then Mr. Devlin moves away, but before he does, it’s revealed that… he’s a vampire. [dramatic sound] (Mr. Devlin): Here, let me get the door. (Fred’s Mom): Oh! [door closing] [scream] Which means nothing, ‘cuz the movie is over. So, this movie’s bad, of course. If we’re actually gonna talk about the film seriously, and talk about it as if it’s a movie, it’s just an irritating experience. The editing is bad, the music is bad, it attempts to spoof other horror films, and just other films in general that have nothing to do with what’s going on in the plot. The movie just feels so padded. There’s a bunch of other side-plots and shit I didn’t even mention in this review, ‘cuz it’s so inconsequential to what’s happening. Fred is irritating… this movie fails on basically every level. And the only… enjoyable part… was some of the random humor. There are some visual gags that I actually found kind of funny for two seconds, but then they went on longer than they had to, and they completely fuck it up. It’s kind of why John Cena is the most entertaining part of the movie… ‘cuz he’s barely in it… I hate it when studios just throw together a bunch of shit for kids, and go: “Eh, it’s for kids. They’ll like it.” Like, wh- Hold on. Headache… God, this movie’s giving me a headache. I can see why it made Alex sick. Oh, I’m sure I’ll be okay, though. [heartbeat monitor] (IHE): Well… (IHE): I’m not paying you. (high-pitched) C’mere, Camp Fred, it’s time to make you… (high-pitched) …squeal like a little pig! (high-pitched) C’mere! Ooh! C’MERE!!! Fred 3: Camp Fred… is the fucking worst piece of shit movie I’ve seen. Since Suicide Squad, I guess. I have this problem where every bad film just seems worse and worse each time, and I don’t know how to properly start these introductory paragraphs anymore. Wait, I have an idea. Fred 3: Camp Fred… …is the worst thing in the history of anything, ever. That works. I’ve never said that before. …Because movie. So Fred 3: Camp Fred is easily the worst of the trilogy, as is tradition, I guess, with trilogies at this point. The terribleness kind of doubles with each movie, and that’s with the first Fred movie being a piece of shit, still. So this movie is four times worse than the first terrible Fred movie. Oh… Oh, God. The film opens with a completely flat and bland musical number. (Fred): Today is my favorite day, I do hope it’s not cli- The production is bad, the lyrics are bad, everything is forced, and the guy who plays Fred can no longer properly do the Fred voice. So they somehow managed to make Fred’s already annoying voice, even more annoying-ier. (Fred): …water slides, two waffle bars, traditional and Belg- The mum character is back, and she’s also somehow worse. (Fred’s Mom): The camp Iwannapeepee boss. It’s almost like none of these people care about the artistic merits of… Fred 3: Camp Fred. I guess school is over for Fred, so it’s time for him to go to summer camp. I don’t really understand what summer camp is. I guess it’s a camp you go to in… summer?… You Americans are just so weird. Fred is eyeing this amazing-looking summer camp called Camp Superior. Which, by the way, was voted #1 summer camp by Summer Camp Magazine, don’t you know. But Fred’s mother is a cheapskate, so instead sends him to Camp… (sigh) Iwannapeepee. (Fred’s Mom): (slowed down with echo) Camp Iwannapeepee- I don’t really understand the joke. Can somebody explain the joke to me? Is the joke that “Camp Iwannapeepee” kinda sounds like… “Camp I want to pee-pee”? I gotta be missing something here, somebody call the comedy police; this movie’s got some explaining to do! In a lot of ways, this film is the exact same as the previous two Fred flicks. The annoying YouTube-video-style editing is the same as it’s always been. They continue to do the weird hallucination sequences, which… are all in Fred’s imagination. Camp Fred is basically the result of a hack writer completely running out of ideas for funny scenes he can do with the Fred character. “Well, I guess we’ve already done the famous ‘Fred x Judy’ storyline. Oh, and also done the… that classic ‘My teacher is a vampire’ Halloween special. What’s left on the list of… fucking boring predictable made-for-TV cheap ideas? Oh, I know! Let’s make Fred go to camp! Summer camp! This movie’s pretty much writing itself!” I don’t even think the guy who plays Fred; Lucas, even wanted to be in this movie. No one wanted to be in this movie. The movie didn’t want to be in this movie! In fact, when I opened the amazing trilogy box set, which cost me, like, a fucking fortune, the third DVD actually tried to escape! I had to hunt it down, it was a whole thing! The only person who is into this at all is the guy who plays the bully character, Kevin! Who is so into playing this character that I actually find it a little bit disturbing. But, man, props to him. Props to him for not being this bitch, who is completely insulting to watch. (Fred’s Mom): FRREEEE- The bus ride to Camp Iwannapeepee manages to make every annoying scream scene from the previous two movies seem trivial in comparison. [Fred sped-up screaming] Hearing Fred scream to the heavens for a solid 45 seconds is just a fucking piss-take. It’s not funny. It takes all the goodwill I had for the Fred scream, which, admittedly, was a small amount to begin with, and throws all of that away, for basically the most lazy gag imaginable. I wonder if they’ve run out of ideas or not. (Guy): It’s a needlepoint of me needlepointing. (Fred): Nice… I fucking hate every single scene in this film. I hate every single scene. Not one thing is funny. In the previous two movies, I got at least one laugh. This film right here? This film just fucking pisses me off. The made-for-TV cheap Nickelodeon vibe is the strongest in this one, as well. Despite it literally being a made-for-TV cheap Nickelodeon production. The most immediately distracting thing is that Fred has aged quite a bit compared to his early 2008 innocent YouTube days. He’s actually a man now. So seeing this fully grown man running around in suspenders, screaming and being a fucking retard loses a bit of its charm. And when I say ‘charm’, I mean that… incredibly loosely. I could forgive this aspect in the first movie because he still looked quite young, so it didn’t stand out too much. But when he’s sat next to literal children, it really does stand out. Insufferable scene after insufferable scene… where nothing fucking happens… finally leads us to the introduction of the supporting characters. In Fred 3: (close to mic) Camp fucking Fred. Meet Nerd! He’s a NERD! Meet Fat. He’s fat. And he never talks. (Magoo): Oh, that’s Chatter. Don’t mind him; he never talks. Meet Asian. She eats all the time? That’s her character? (Magoo): That one over there is Spoon. (Magoo): She’s always eating. (Magoo): And I mean ALWAYS. (Spoon): A lot. And also meet Oddly Serious Token Black Kid. (Magoo): Last, but not least, (Magoo): There’s [bleep]. (Fred): Why do they call you [bleep]? This cast of characters could not be more cookie-cutter, lazy, predictable, uninteresting, boring, flat, pathetic, or calculated, even if they fucking tried. (echo) Hey, what’s the story of this movie?! We’re twelve minutes in, and I have no idea what this movie is about, except that Fred has gone to summer camp. Well, it is… is anything gonna happen? Unlike the previous movies, this film has scenes that just don’t fucking end. The cafeteria scene lasts, like, five minutes. Doesn’t have a single funny joke, and has basically no point at all. Except to very obviously and blatantly establish these oddly specific character traits. (in stupid voice) Which, I wonder if they’ll come into play later on, (in stupid voice) DURRRRR! I’d like to note that not only is there a burp joke, but there’s also a fart joke in the exact same scene. [burp] [fart] Somehow Fred: The Movie, and even Fred 2: Night of the Living Fred managed to avoid the easy-to-abuse… fart and burp joke. [fart noise] Oops! Huh, sorry guys; the food I ate at the hospital has been driving my intestines insane. [burp noise] Better out than in, as I always say! Please laugh at me! Fred tries to escape the camp because he hates it so much. But heavily armed soldiers stop him from leaving. (close to mic) Why don’t you just pull the fucking trigger and end this shit… please? And then I guess the soldiers kill him and put him into the food… and the Asian girl finds a severed finger in her gruel, and it turns out Fred is actually fucking dead. Thank God. Is this movie over? (Fred): Oh, Mom, I had the most horrible nightmare! (Fred): I dreamt you sent me to the worst summer camp ever, and… also I had this weird, sped-up chipmunk voice that got really annoying after a while. Oh, just fuck off! Fuck off! John Cena comes out of a fridge… again. And again, he’s the only entertaining aspect. His screentime in this movie is cut by about three-quarters. He’s only in this… one single scene. What does that tell – (*loud burp*) – you? [Fred scream] There’s this strangely intimate scene that comes out of nowhere where… Lucas Cruikshank… starts weeping. [Fred weeping] Probably because he remembered that he’s the lead star in Fred 3: Camp Fred. I’m only kidding, of course! It’s only the most predictable gag of all time! Hahaha… (high-pitched) Oh… oh I hope it’s not… (high-pitched) Oh, no, I hope it’s not gonna turn out to be poison ivy! (high-pitched) Ah! Ha, poison ivy is SO FUNNY, HA!!! What the fuck is going on?! Fred has this, like, completely dumb, unfounded idea, that the campworkers are poisoning the kids and feeding them to a giant rat creature?… Yeah. Fred’s a fucking moron. Obviously, it turns out that every part of his theory is completely wrong. And all that’s going on is that the other kids have a secret base where they eat junk food. That’s the big reveal. What an amazing surprise. Can this movie be over now, yeah? (fart noise) (fart noise again) Wait, no-no-no-no-no… Nah, nah, nah, what do you mean this movie still has forty minutes left?! What the hell is… even left to happen?! What could even happen now?! This… this film’s concluded! Out of nowhere this film just suddenly turns into a competition called the “Summer Camp Games”. Where Kevin, the bully, shows up, which his crew of… fucking forty-year-olds… to compete against children. For twenty fucking minutes. It’s just scene after scene of games that would be boring to do in real life, let alone watch in a movie. Camp Iwannapeepee starts off by losing. But then they win, because the Asian girl who always eats… eats a pie. And the fat one sings a song really well. (Chatter): (singing) Camp Iwannapeepee! Then Fred has a musical number about how he’s a loser. I’m not even joking, that’s literally what he sings about, he sings about how he’s a massive fuckin’ loser. (Kids onstage): This is for the losers, sing it all! Then the film wraps up all nicely, with a little bow on top, and everyone goes home. And the general public never has to see anything Fred-related ever again, because… I guess this thing flopped, hopefully, everyone hated it, channel’s dead, Fred is dead. Fred is dead. If I was being interrogated by someone who was asking me about the plots of these three Fred movies, and I had to think on my feet to actually remember what happens in them, I would really, really struggle to recall anything that happens in this fucking bullshit film, because it’s so meandering and meaningless. Fred: The Movie is about a loser who’s trying to get his hot neighbour to be his girlfriend; simple. Fred 2 is a Halloween-themed adventure about Fred suspecting that his music teacher’s a vampire, and he has to try to defeat him; simple. Fred 3 is about… uh… He goes to summer camp? There’s, like, a dead body… but it’s not a dead body, it’s pizza?… Then the film randomly changes into a team camp challenge… thing? I couldn’t tell you; it’s just such a mess! The third movie is definitely the fucking worst. None of them are good movies, and I wouldn’t recommend them to anyone in any situation. The editing is bad in all of them, the direction is bad in all of them, the acting is bad in all of them, the cinematography is flat and filmed like a cheap TV movie, (*whispering*) (which they all basically are…) everything even remotely creative means nothing in the universe because they are effectively dream sequences, it’s basically, from beginning to end, a miserable time all ’round. I guess the biggest problem is that this was just a terrible idea to begin with. Let me tell you a story. A long time ago, when I first got an iPod Touch with a camera on it, I recorded a video of myself playing a character somewhat similar to Fred. My character was called Pisser Dick. He was an American with a thick Texan accent, wore a giant sombrero for some reason, and he reviewed Wii Fit in a funny voice, and he swore a lot. If I still had the footage, I would show it to you. Except, luckily, I had the gumption to realise how fucking awful it was a long time ago, and I deleted it so no one would ever see the fucking embarrassing crap it was. These Fred movies are about as good an idea… as a Pisser Dick movie would be. It’s the problem with these internet ideas that seem funny when you’re, like… twelve… and just need to stay on YouTube, they belong on YouTube. Fred was lucky; he got a ton of attention from his stupid little videos, and that attention garnered the eyes of greedy corporate suits who thought they could get ahead of the curve and start making movies about internet celebrities, without actually stopping and thinking for a second about how bad an idea that is. I genuinely do hope that Lucas Cruikshank made his money from this shit while he had the chance. But these movies are fucking trash. After this video’s over, I don’t expect anyone to ever talk about or mention them again. They’re just forgettable garbage. Mind you, though… mind you… these movies did confirm something for me: while the Fred trilogy is… fucking awful… none of them, not one of them… holds a candle to the fucking pure misery that is the Smosh movie. Which is honestly one of the biggest pieces of shit… I’ve ever seen. The Fred movie – the first one – is actually masterful in comparison to the Smosh movie. I would be… pretty fuckin’ embarrassed if I were Smosh. Because even when the movie based on fucking Fred Figglehorn is better than yours… well… you really fucked up pretty bad, didn’t you, boys? I’d like to thank Ralphthemoviemaker for helping me through this video by taking care of the second film, I did watch that movie myself, of course, I agree with every word Ralph said. Make sure you subscribe to his channel; there will be a link at the end, annotations in the description, and on the card in the top-right corner if you press the little “i” button thing, he makes amazing movie reviews; they’re so funny, and he deserves way more subscribers than he has. So please, go send him some support, go watch his videos; they’re genuinely great. Leave him a ton of comments thanking him for “sharing the load”… N-not in a sexual way; that was a reference to Lord of the Rings. We didn’t share loads. If you are interested in hearing my exact thoughts on Fred 2 specifically, you can also check out the Trying to Watch for this video when that goes up in a couple days. So as always, thanks for watching, subscribe to Ralphthemoviemaker, all comments and ratings are very much appreciated, why don’t you tell me in the comments which film looks the worst to you out of the trilogy? And don’t worry; I haven’t forgotten about the wheel that tells you which movie’s coming next. I’m gonna keep the next Search For The Worst a secret to surprise you all again. I’ll see you next time, BYE!

100 thoughts on “The Fred Movie Trilogy – The Search For The Worst – IHE

  1. It's been a long time in the making, but it's finally here. And yes, they're just as bad as you anticipated.

    Also it's kind of neat that I beat my previous record for longest video with this one! Make sure you like and share with your friends because that's the best way of building an audience on YouTube now.

  2. We gonna ignore the fact that his drug addicted, alcoholic, prostitute, abusive thot of a mother could afford something close to a mansion.

  3. About a year ago I saw this video for the first time and it still homds up.
    Plus this video introduced me to ralphthemoviemaker, sooo thank you 4 that 🙂

  4. All the Fred movies were better than this entire video. Literally way, way better. The second movie review, whoever that was, was just awful. This is definitely your worst video ever. By the way camp iwannapeepee is a racist dis on Native American culture.

  5. For a Brit that tries to act like he doesn't understand the concept of Summer Camp here in the U S. you certainly grasp the fact it is one of the cliche' genres of children's movies so I think you grew up watching Disney Channel and know damn well what Summer Camp is all about lol.

  6. I remember watching this movie a lot when I was little, I didn't like it but I watched it so much and I have no idea why

  7. 1:36 How did this get on a kid’s video? I know we have Elsagate and stuff like that, but a little girl is talking to and learning this from a person!

  8. I hate everything you can’t hate everything the movies not erroneous the show is not I want everybody to believe that please

  9. I wore suspenders and tucked my t shirt into my jeans in 2010 😔 haters always hatin

  10. Hey how's this for an idea: Cut together some of the scenes/shots from the film, and then finish it with Lucas Cruikshank wakes up at the end and it's all a bad dream.

  11. I remember these movies as a kid, and the kids around me laughing at it. I remember being bored out of my mind while watching it and thinking everyone around me was dumb.

  12. So rewatching this as I do every year it seems I just realized that there is one single line that has been festering away in the back of my head about why it sounds so wrong. 27:24 "Why did he have an umbrella in the day time?" ……. Who wrote this line… Do they know what umbrellas are actually used for? Do they think they're for protection from the dark? Just… Alright fine.

  13. 13:07 I thought Fred was about to take a crap that’s bigger than himself and a few seconds later that happens with someone else, at least for me this movie is predictable.

  14. When Fred said Night Of the Living Fred’s, I thought he said nine eleven which is ate same as the movie. A horrible disaster.

  15. It’s so terrible how the third movie is for 6 year olds I’m 11 and the rat man scared the shit out of me

  16. This movie was horrible and traumatized me as a young child. Thanks for that very “important” part of my childhood.

  17. “Movie, Fred.. it was the movie, Fred: The movie”
    “Ahpplansjebsb gah movie Fred movie movie Fred movie it was movie Fred Fred was movie”

    31:39 look at Fred

  18. Me and my mom have this running joke where every time my mom's taking a nap she yells "I'M TAKING A NAP" also I somehow loved this movie before I don't know how that happened

  19. It's strange how they made him wear the yellow striped shirt and suspenders ALL the time, even when he's shirtless. Even went out of their way to make like leopard print and glitter versions, as if it was this big iconic thing from the show. But as far as I can tell it's something he only wears on these movies.

  20. Legend has it, he now reacts to shows from the early 2000s, gay, and imma sub to him. Congrats Lucas!

  21. 46:22 Because I'm an asshole I imdb'ed the character's name and it's Dig. IHE made this work with a simple beep.
    Also would've accepted if his name was BBC, like Bryant Bennett Cameron or something – anything but the original pathetic dick joke.

  22. OMG!!!!!!!!1111!!!!!!111!
    u r sooooo stoopid!!!11 fred 3 iz symbolluck of outc4sts and what itd be t0 be a loozer!!!11! u stuck up prick11!

  23. It's almost like Nickelodeon is a disgusting exploitative corporation that rehires convicted pedophiles to work with children to make soft core pedophilia.

  24. The ‘Camp iwanapeepee’ joke is because American summer camps are often named after Native American words or tribes so it is basically a fake native word that sounds like a grotesque English phrase

  25. I don't know who this "Fred" guy is.. And quite frankly I would really rather not find out. I watched exactly 1 minute of this video and I believe if I see (or rather, hear) any more of him, I might just fall out of my chair and die. I like your videos and I apologise for not watching this one fully, because… I can't~

  26. Man, I remember what YouTube was like back in 2009. The days when ads didn't rape you twice over on a single video and the Googlestapo didn't punish you for doing what you want to do. Ah…

    … And then I remember this squeaky voiced twat.

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