Resentment (How to Let Go of Resentment) – Teal Swan –
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Hello there, resentment is one of the strongest
hooks that anchors us to the past, but the hook is even
stronger if it’s ignored For that reason it’s critical to face
resentment directly and to create resolve Resentment Resentment is the state of
being in pain as a result of perceiving that you have been
treated wrongly, unfairly and unjustly It usually involves
not feeling willing or able to accept something
or someone that you reject. I call it a state of being because it
is not an emotion in and of itself. Instead it is like a soup
of different emotions all associated with
being treated unfairly emotions like dumbfounded,
fear, anger, disgust and sadness. One of the main challenges as
far as resentment is concerned Is that it instantly converts
itself to distrust. To understand all about trust, I want you to watch my
video on [YouTube] titled : TRUST (What Is Trust and How
To Build Trust In Relationships) Trust is essentially the
ability to rely on the fact that somebody is going to capitalize
on and consider your best interests. Now think about being treated
unfairly, unjustly or wrongly. Obviously someone’s proved
to you that you cannot rely on them to capitalize on and
consider your best interest That’s why resentment comes
with so much distrust This bitter distrust is usually
what people are feeling in someone when they say that
someone can’t let go of resentment you will find that it’s easier
to let go of something If it doesn’t have a major impact
on your present or your future. But when it comes to
chronic resentment you will find that usually
it involves some unjust treatment that does have a big negative impact on
your present or your future. for example if your
husband or wife spends all the money in
your account on gambling that may mean that you lose
your house in the present and that you can’t afford to put your
kids through college in the future Even if these kind of big consequences
don’t exist, distrust still exists, This means you
will feel closed off and like an enemy to that
person in your life now and you will expect them to
betray you again in the future Now, fair versus unfair,
and wrong versus right, is a matter of perspective, it is
a highly subjective concept. However as it applies to resentment
It’s important to know that there may be times when
you have been treated unfairly or felt like that and you actually
have been treated unfairly other times where objectively, it
will feel like you’ve been mistreated and objectively perhaps someone
did in fact treat you well. The thing is, is it
still a valid feeling. You can still feel resentment
regardless of how right or wrong you are
about being treated unfairly. It is tempting to think that your
struggle with resentment is all relative to some recent thing
in the distant past which is causing you
to feel unjustly treated. However if strong resentment is
present then there is almost always strong infiltration from
past experiences in other words earlier experiences
with being treated unfairly not being considered by
others, being disregarded, and having your boundaries violated Before we launch into what
to do about your resentment. We have to acknowledge
that there is always a positive reason why we’re
attached to something something that we’re getting
out of not letting go of something. As it applies to resentment, resentment is really the unwillingness
or inability to forgive. Letting go are forgiving gives
most people the feeling that they simultaneously have
to let go of the unmet need to be treated fairly and justly
in a way that creates trust. And so, in order to honor their
need to have just a fair treatment. They will not forgive resentment essentially can be
like a wall that a person uses to protect themselves and
try to get their needs met a person may keep resentment as both
a boundary and a personal reminder as if to say no one will
ever do this to me again Also, you will find that your sense of
self, what some people call the ego, It needs to be right and
it needs to be good. so obviously if it can look
at somebody and say: “That person hurt me. That
person treated me unfairly.” “Then I’m in the victim role.”
and in today’s society the victim is the good one and
the victim is the right one. Whereas the perpetrator is the
wrong one and the bad one. and so the ego feeds that kind
of a concept through resentment. So how do we say this
in a different way? Resentment may be our way of
feeling like we are a good person. I’m also going to expose another
one of these positive intentions for holding on resentment, and
it’s a pretty interesting one when somebody has wronged us, If they’re going to stay in our life it
kind of puts them in a position where they have to make it up
to us or they owe us. Now if we feel unsafe in relationships,
especially unsafe to how people treat us, putting people in that position where
they have to make it up to us, is putting them in
a lower position and us in a more, let’s say,
empowered position than them. So we try to gain safety through this
power play of putting them in a position where they have to make right with us
because of something wrong they did That becomes our guarantee of good treatment in the
present and in the future. So what you do if you feel resentment, and you want to let it go? Step 1 : you have to become
completely conscious about what exactly it is that
you are so resentful about. What happened to you that you
felt was unjust and unfair? What did someone do that
they shouldn’t have done ? Or didn’t they do, that
they should have done? Going deeper… Underneath this thing that you say
you feel resentful about currently, what unresolved in long-standing history
of being treated unfairly and unjustly Is underneath this particular resentment ? Am I confusing this
person or this situation with someone or
something from my past ? step 2 : you have to ask yourself whether what you’re
really resentful about Is the fact that you treated
yourself unfairly and unjustly Is there something
you feel guilty about ? or some culpability in this situation
that you can’t forgive yourself for? For example let’s say that one day,
I decided to get super super drunk and I blacked out
and then I got raped. I may spend my life with
resentment towards the rapist without realizing that the
genuine resentment I feel is towards the fact that
I got so blackout drunk that I even put myself in a
position where that could happen. You will find that resentment and
the blame that goes along with it feels better than self blame and
better than being blamed by them. Sometimes we can only let go
of resentment towards others if we let go of the resentment
we hold towards our self Step 3 : get really really
clear about the impact that this resentment is
having on your life. I want you to close your eyes, and think if you kept this level or
a more extreme level of resentment What would be the impact
of that in your future? What areas of your
life is it affecting? For example if I resent my spouse I can see that I have no desire
to make love with them So we may eventually drift apart and he or she or I may
seek another partner. Step 4 : acceptance is a critical
part of letting go of resentment because if your resentment is present
it means you cannot accept something. Don’t confuse acceptance of something with adopting something as your
preference or endorsing it. But take a look at the situation is
causing you to feel resentful and ask yourself the
following question : What am I unwilling to
accept about this situation? Once you have answered
that question ask yourself: Why am I unwilling to accept that? If I accepted that what would it mean or what bad thing
would happen ? The thing you have to see is that
if you’re in a state of resentment you are pushing really
really hard against it You’re in rejection of it.
You’re saying no to it. But you can’t push really
really hard against anything without putting equal
pressure on yourself. Go ahead and try it. Hit your hand against
the wall sometime and see if you can do it in a way where
your hand does not get kicked back. This is why so often people
say that resentment is nothing, but trying to kill other
people by drinking poison. Once you realize this
about resentment you get to ask yourself
the question: “Is it worth it?’ I’m not going to answer
that question for you nor am I the kind of spiritual teacher
who says it’s wrong to say, yes, It’s worth it.
It may be. It may be for you. But if you’re willing to
let go of it you have to acknowledge that it is not
worth hitting your own hand, to hit someone else Step 5 : you have to ask
yourself really honestly; What bad thing would happen if I
let go of this resentment today? Like it or not, the answer
to that question is not: “You’re right, I feel better
nothing bad would happen.” There is a part of you who is convinced that something really bad will happen
if you let go of this resentment. So the question is:
“What is that?” For example perhaps
the answer might be: “If I forgive him or her I make
what they did to me, okay and it’s not okay.” Or if I forgive him or her they will
not get how much they hurt me, so they will do
it to me again. or if I forgive him, or her I’m being like a human
punching bag or a doormat which is just pathetic or if I forgive him or her I
will never receive the justice and fair treatment that I need. So I want you to consider not only
why you can’t let go of the resistance and resentment, and
forgive someone else, I also want you to ask these questions
relative to why you can’t forgive yourself. What bad thing would
happen if you did so? Step 6 Resolve the resultant wound. but is not just about this current
situation you think you’re resentful about but also the resentment
that is underneath it all to do this I want you to use my process
called “The Completion Process” You can learn that process in depth in my book that’s titled:
The Completion Process So use this process directly with that feeling of resentment
as it occurs inside your body. Now another awesome
thing happens when you use this process
is that in the middle of it Great insight comes in as
to how you can solve this current presentment
issue that you’re having. Step 7 : deal with your powerlessness
and your rumination differently. If you feel resentment
you are preoccupied with thinking about the causes
and consequences of your distress instead of focusing
on solutions to it. This is your beings natural
way of trying to draw focus to the wound
that is not healed. But the decision to look for
solutions for the distress and solutions for how to make the present
or future different in a positive way Turn your focus in
a different direction. A direction that will lead to
results, instead of pain it may help you to look at
the worst case scenario and not only to figure out
what you learned from this situation that happened that
you’re feeling resentful about but also What could you do? What power do you have relative
to the worst case scenario? What actions could you take? This will help you to no longer
fear being blindsided by it. If you’re struggling with
resentment the reality is is that you spend your time vacillating
between two emotions those emotions are Powerlessness and the terror and fear associated
with that powerlessness, and Anger / Rage. What happens is you’re looking
at your life, or I should say this situation you got yourself into,
this causing you to feel a resentment is causing you
to see your life Through the lens of
“I am powerless to others.” or “I am powerless to myself,” or
“I’m powerless to the world around me.” When you look at your life
through that Powerless worldview now instantly you
want to feel better and so the next logical
step is to go into anger. So you kind of subconsciously
pull yourself into Anger, but then you go back to focusing on
how you’re powerless in the situations and you go back down into
that powerless type of a terror, and then you go back
up and to anger. So that vacillation
back and forth, is really the breeding
grounds for resentment So the question is what could
you do relative to this situation to help you feel less Powerless,
more empowered ? What power could you
have in this situation ? When we feel a resentment is an
indication that we do feel like a victim Now I’m really sick of this idea
in the spiritual community that there is something super
innately wrong with victim mentality There’s a lot of victim mentality
shaming happening. And so even if you do
genuinely feel like a victim you can’t admit it in this
field because people go: “Oh my God. What a victim.” The reality is you have to
acknowledge that aspect of you. You’ve got to validate it. You’ve
got to spend time care taking it. But you don’t let
it lead the boat. Now that being said once
you have cared for and acknowledged the
victim aspect of you the victim is in a place
of powerlessness So what do we find? when people look back at situations
to cause them to feel like they were treated unjustly, through
the lens of : “How did I cause this?” How did I create it or
what was my role in it? And they take responsibility
in that way, What is the natural byproduct
of that responsibility? A feeling of I had something to do
with this and so I am in control. We see that a feeling
of empowerment and a loss of that feeling
of disempowerment occurs I just really want you to avoid slipping
into self blame when you do this. That is not the direction
you want to go. Slipping in self blame is even worse
than blaming other people. In a vibrational sense
it does worse things to your body, your mind
and your emotional state. so without slipping
into self blame, just for the sake of you going
into more empowerment instead of looking at the world
through a powerless worldview You want to look at how you have any
responsibility for the role you played in this situation and
how knowing that you could do something
differently in the future Step 8 : take the situation where
you feel like you were treated unfairly and unjustly and
wrongly and try to find approval for what happened. Anything you can possibly think that is positive about
that having happened. People who did not suffer
from past traumas are the ones who managed to
see them as a benefit to themselves Instead of as a detriment. As hard as it may sound do not take
this as an invalidation of the pain. Simply do this practice for the
sake of your own desire to feel better personally. earlier in this video I explained
that if you’ve got resentment it is that you are unwilling
to accept something that you judge
as wrong or bad. You cannot accept something
that you do not like. How do you get yourself
to accept something? You get really
aggressive with it. The most aggressive way to accept
is to find approval for something. If you find approval instead of saying
no to something you’re saying yes to it. So focus towards what happened in the way where you can agree
with it instead of disagree with it. Part of this process involves
looking at how the situation could have been
worse than it was This will help you naturally develop
acceptance for what occurred. And remember make this more about
a commitment to your own well-being rather than anything else 9 : Meaning is the basis for suffering. what happens when we
experience something where we feel like we are
treated unjustly and unfairly? We add meaning
to the experience. And not positive meaning,
negative meaning. to understand how this occurs I want you to watch my
Youtube video titled: Meaning ( The Self-destruct Button) For the sake of this video, I’m
going to give you an example; Let’s say that the unfair thing
the unjust thing that happen is that my partner
cheated on me. Now maybe I make that mean that they
don’t love me or that I’m not worthy. It’s that meaning that we add
to the experience, in fact, that causes us pain. So on top of figuring out
what painful meaning you added to this unfair experience, I want you to figure out how
what happened is not personal. When unjust and unfair thing
has happened to us, bad things, we take it personally. We never make it about what’s
going on in the other person’s life. When oftentimes that is a crucial
element to why we were treated unfairly. So one of the keys to getting
over this unjust and unfairness is to try to look for how what
happened, is not personal. it may have more to do with what’s
going on in the life of that other person 10 : Resentment is synonymous with the non expression of
painful emotional truths“. What we will find when
we’re dealing is resentment. probably 9 out of 10 if not
10 out of 10 times is that there’s something
that occurred and we did not express
the way we felt about it when it happened because we were
afraid of the consequences of doing so. So what happens those feeling,
because they had nowhere to go, become internalized and that
internalization of resentment instantly ferments those feelings and
they turn into resentment. take a look at what
you did not express in the situation that
you feel resentful about What’s the truth you did not share? Then take an even deeper look at
why you did not express those things. For example you may have
been terrified of rejection or fearful of losing a connection. Or you may have felt like it wasn’t
going to make any difference you did. 11 : take a serious look at
your own expectations. If resentment is present it means
that one of our expectations we had no one lived up to it. So you get clear relative to
this unserved circumstance, what you expected. also, get clear on what
you expect currently. And communicate
that to other people. But to understand more about
this concept of expectation, I need you to watch my
youtube video that is titled: Priceless Relationship Advice
(Expectations and Assumptions) Step 12 : if you feel resentment it means
something is not how you want it to be. it means that looking
at that situation You are telling yourself that
something should be, that isn’t or
shouldn’t be, that is So you can choose to question
your shoulds or your shouldn’ts. One of my favorite processes
for this is Byron Katie’s work That is quite literally
called: “The Work” Conversely, you can realize that
knowing what you do not want, how you don’t want
something to be, is a very great way of becoming
aware of what you do want and how you do
want something to be. And once you know that, you
can focus with all of your effort like feeding all of your focus attention
and all of the energy into that direction. Towards what you want,
through visualizations, through taking actual action
steps to create those things You’re headed in the
direction of what is wanted instead of ruminating
over what is unwanted. The truth is that resentment,
it kills relationships. But it is not a monster
and it is not an enemy. Resentment is just a natural
byproduct of having no resolution. So focus directly on
creating that resolution, on feeling empowered, going in the direction of what
you now know that you do want. and the byproducts of that lack
of resolution will no longer occur. Have a good week. Subtitles by: Tanya Duarte Subtitles by the Amara.org community

100 thoughts on “Resentment (How to Let Go of Resentment) – Teal Swan –

  1. thank you so much for this clarity. My boyfriend will not forgive me for something so ridiculous, and it has broken my heart, he ended our relationship…….

  2. I resent all
    The time I spent in a class or with other people after losing my son thinking.. I could have spent that time with him.
    So am i distrusting myself or just hating the thing that took me away from him?
    Yes I guess I feel like a selfish and blind asshole to do what I wanted and abandoning him
    Yes I hyper focused on the class because I couldn’t handle the situation with him, and he suffered and died alone, after begging me to come see him for two years. I am disabled so it would have been tough but I could have done it. If I’d known of course I would have, even if I’d had to crawl 80 miles.
    I didn’t even know it had been two years since I saw him last
    I was so focused on the class

  3. I can’t handle any more suffering and I see so much suffering around me.. I am surrounded by suffering and dying homeless people. I have a place but am disabled. I
    Am afraid of ending up like them. At Least I know that.
    Truly I want a quick death. I don’t even care if there’s an afterlife. I can’t kill myself because that’s not something I align with but i do hope not to wake up most of the time. Time goes so slowly. I could last a long time. If I get in a good place emotionally maybe I’ll line up with a quick death. If Teals right I’ll see my dead family then. Or nothing. Either way beats the hell out of trying to sort through all this shit

  4. I resent the universe for the consequences of having me born in a place where I was tortured daily for six years as a newborn to age six so that I was totally disconnected from my feelings. This is what turned me into a person that attacked and abandoned my family entirely unconsciously. I’m not saying I was right or Good (believe me I don’t feel ‘good’).
    I wasn’t safe with my family.
    So maybe I did put them as less than me in an effort to feel safe that totally backfired because then someone else I loved died.
    So Am I unsafe with the universe. So I Am I trying to put it in a position of being in the wrong.
    I think it totally is in the wrong! Why in the fuck did it put me there?!!! Six years of absolute daily HELL!!
    I have seizures 60% of the day every day from it.
    I live alone. Everyone is dead. How in the hell can I not be angry?
    Idk. I really don’t. It seems impossible .
    I am unwilling to accept that I am the universe and I did this to myself. Fuck the universe
    I don’t know if it’s worth it. It’s like a reflex. I can’t help it.
    I’m raving angry at the whole fucking process of life and death and wish I was never involved in any of it

  5. Yes I feel fucking powerless. Yes I feel terror. I never ever feel any better BECAUSE EVERYONE IS DEAD AND GONE!

  6. I can’t find approval for six years of torture during my developmental years and my subsequent ugly behavior

  7. I found this video really helpful and has put me at ease over a big resentment I was feeling a lot of anger over! Your explanation of resentments and how and why they occur and how to deal with them is brilliant ! thank u Teal xx

  8. I'm done trying to make a positive relationship with my mother happen. I resent her for all the emotional abuse over the years. I expected a loving, caring mother. I accept the reasons I allowed the emotional abuse for so long. Now I have to accept moving forward without the constant trying to please my mom who can't be there for me. She is barely there for herself. Now as an adult woman I'm learning to self love and let people help me. It's crazy but I wouldn't change anything. It was a hard road coming but I accept the inner child that wanted Mommy to approve of her and I give her that approval today. I was never a bad daughter or person I just wanted to be listened and understood by my mother.

  9. I cant stress how much i love the perspective that you have. I listen to a lot of videos in this genre, and your ability to add 'realism', for lack of a better word, to the topic. That often is lost with spiritualism; in my opinion the variable of chaos that isn't represented correctly most often.

  10. Letting go of it and realizing I want a real friend that puts me first and relations where I am not abused.

  11. Sorry, is she seriously saying that victim blaming, particularly in rapes is ok? So if someone rapes you bc you're drink it is your fault? You gotta be kidding me…

  12. I'm afraid to let go of resentment toward my mother because it feels like a betrayal of my inner child. She's still not in great shape and it almost feels like it's not my decision to make until she's ready. I feel guilty because I never stuck up for her like I should have. This helped me figure out what's going on. Thanks 🙂

  13. Resentment is a slow relationship killer that needs to die in order to be happy. If you think of the pain that resentment causes not only to yourself but to the people you onced loved or love, it makes you wonder… Is it worth it? If we remember never to take personally others behavior and accept that maybe what they did had absolutely nothing to do with you, you will be able to release the resentment you hold on their actions.

  14. I think I have been given this lesson before, but this is the first time I understood it. Many thanks!

  15. I initially resented you and your series and then realized after careful consideration it was because I can see myself doing something similar to your series.. I don't resent you.. but myself for not having the sense to do the same. Kudos.

  16. I love how Teal gets immediately to the point of the video.
    In the same vein, I find it so comedic how she's just like, "Hello there, so anyways, resentment…", and yet I totally appreciate it, because it's not like I'd enjoy some kind of tedious sponsorship or intro right off the bat.
    Love it- I'm so glad I found Teal.

  17. Well done. Everyone needs to listen at least 5 times. Looking at being a victim was huge. A Paradym shift for me.
    Thank you.

  18. this helps and i think what i really want from the people i resent is for them to truly stay away from me. can that be a solution?

  19. So letting go of resentment means to forgive someone? And giving them another chance?
    I dont know but I cant take this risk with my Narc parents.

    Well I have tried many times in the past to forgive them and move on but , they repeated their cruelty on me then .( i dint know that they were narc at that time) . Narcs dont change. They still treat me with cruelty .but Thank God I am in Low contact with them currently.

    If letting go off resentment just could mean to just heal the resentment wound without giving the abuser another chance then its possible for me. But i cant allow my narc parents to abuse me again.

  20. I trusted my husband and he cheated on me and stole all the family money leaving my kids and I in poverty. I worked hard all my life to end up with nothing. I hate that he got away with it. I am saving this to watch again when I am not so upset.

  21. There is a saying, "being offended(feeling resentment), doesn't mean that you are right"
    meaning… you may feel offended about something, it doesn't mean that you are right about being offended by it…
    You may be resentful about something but still not be right about feeling resentful about it…

  22. They hold on to Resentment so they can hold on to the attention people give them for their feelings of resentment…

  23. Bookmark: 6:02, 6:29, 6:36, 6:46, 7:27, 7:32, 8:03, 8:11, 8:21, 9:00, 9:12, 9:30, 9:53, 10:04, 10:09, 10:20, 10:27, 10:54, 11:06, 11:14, 11:36, 11:50, 12:06, 12:26, 12:49, 12:58 ( I have a fear of being empowered – gotta let go of that), 14:41, 15:53, 17:06, ********17:22********, 17:54, 18:17, 18:29, 18:47, 19:07, 19:21, 19:52

  24. I am not into new age stuff and I saw little or none in this particular video. I certainly do not agree with techniques she uses that I have read about her (after watching this video…) But what I did see is plain old fashioned common sense. Brilliant! Thank you!

  25. I feel like this is actually really useful advice, and it's made me rethink my problem. However, is this advice backed by scientific studies?

  26. Hey Teal woah calm your horses I need you on this one. Can you please made more vids on the subject of when you were saying we dont like to like we didnt express our thinking and so therefore it all came back to us. Like and now so now that is why we don't try to sympathise with people we turn out cold instead in order to protect ourselves. Like i need you more on that. Because it is my fault but please believe me its hard to get out of now that i created it and made it so big. Do i make sense to any of you. I want help with that like understanding and get through it.

  27. I would like if she talked a little bit slower or had visual aids with outlines..but can't complain for receiving such great free content!

  28. solid gold! Thanks again. man i always pause to take notes and fully absorb what you say because there's always so much here. this process is super helpful. thank you!

  29. I have a huge problem with resentment. My resentments are a bit different and awkward. I've been trying to find therapy. Do you have an email I can exchange my problem, mechanism, and solution to you? I connect with most of what you say 75% -85%.

  30. What do we feel like when we are hurt by others? The pain, the anguish occupies our mind and grows into unchecked anger and resentment. If you have been feeling resentful due to something or someone, here are a few ways to deal with it:

    http://somedaytoday.in/how-to-let-go-of-resentment-and-live-happier/

  31. I probably will be working on resentment throughout the rest of my life. Some days I can let go of past hurts easily and other days, I obsess.The good news is those difficult days are getting fewer and less intense. I've been told to forgive so often and it sounds so hollow when you've been traumatized and then treated dismissively by the very people who are supposed to be on your side (family, church, some "friends").
    It helps to remind myself every day, and on vulnerable days, several times a day, that most of my family will never adequately fulfill my needs. It is my responsibility to find and reach out to others who can. As Teal says, resentment leads to distrust and it can be very hard to know who to trust after initially trusting the wrong people. Therapy has helped with that. The person I need to trust the most is generally myself, but sometimes I need to check that my thinking isn't distorted and unhealthy. Sometimes, I'm getting it wrong. I believe in forgiveness, but I'd never tell anyone (s)he MUST forgive. The right persons will never tell you that you MUST forgive. They will love you and aid in your healing so you are able to forgive. They will listen to your resentment and pain without judgment. When you are ready, and you ask for insight, they give advice.
    I have relationships that will never significantly satisfy me, but it's okay. I still love and enjoy for what I can get w/o expecting much. I go to others for deeper needs.

  32. Everything she said in this videos resonated so much with me she almost had me in tears (Its hard for me to cry alone for reasons I dont know). Maybe one day I will attend one of her workshops.

  33. WOW, this is REALLY helping me! Thank you so much! Better than anything I read on the internet or advice from people so far. This goes very detailed into where the feelings comes from and how to get through them and find peace. THANK U SO MUCH.

  34. I know this video is two years old but I very much needed it. Thus far it has been the most thorough and complete discussion I have seen on the matter and touches almost every area I could think of on the matter, some I didn't expect it to touch and others I hadn't even thought of but felt. Thank you very much for this helpful video, I have saved it to my phone and intend to listen to it as often as necessary to help me through this transition state I find myself in letting go of the resentment towards my "ex" that has held my life hostage since last year. I have gone through many stages since our relationship "dissolved" due to actions I considered dishonest and cowardly on her part and I never got my say in it, on the contrary, I only let her hurt me further by accepting her point-of-view for too long and denying my own feelings. But what she chose to do she did and what is done can't be undone and I've has to come to terms with that and accept it but I've also learned that I have to forgive it and let it go for my own well-being as this anger and resentment and desire for vindication is only consuming me and does nothing for the situation. I have finally started to feel the power in the freedom that letting go and not caring gives us it allows me to live my life in peace and makes me realize how much I had given unnecessary or blindly (my fault), how low I had reduced my standards, but also how much I have learned about myself and from all this however painful the experience has been. I don't care to see her again on my life, in truth I don't want too, but I'm not going to sit here in resentment towards her hoping for a vindication that will never happen. I came to realize that the true "vindication", if that is the word, is in the freedom of letting go and not caring and being happy. She will be her own undoing but that's not even my concern anymore, my happiness and life are. We all reap what we sow.

  35. Thank you for explaining this so I could understand it better. And thank you for being there when I needed to hear it.

  36. This video was everything I needed to hear I didn’t know what resentment meant out of millions of video on YouTube I’m glad I stumbled on this because as you were talking I was getting ah ha moments

  37. This was my today’s best video watch and lesson learning time with you , i wish to meet you and hold your hand and just cry and laugh at the same time !! ♥️♥️

  38. My daughters resent me
    Going on 6+years
    It doesn’t bother me as much as it bothers them noticing it doesn’t bother me

  39. I'm Resentment about how I was treated by my family. ? Resentment towards my sister its because we do things differently and everything has to be my sister and mom way or it's the high way. I have always been belittled from my sister she thinks everything has to be done her and if not done correctly she gets mad at me for it .?

  40. Hi Teal this helped me a lot you are so different from a lot of other channels I end up immediately going back to victim mode and torture myself😓. I don’t think I will get better immediately though cause it’s ptsd for me but with repetition I think I’ll come to be at peace with myself. 🧘🏻‍♂️Thanks 🙏

  41. This is amazing! Thank you for making it so clear. I have ben suffering for over 20 years, I appreciate your knowledge…i will try and progress from here.thank you

  42. Thank you so much I watched your video from start to finish and I am beyond amazed of the words that you spoke I am looking at the resentment that I have in a new light I am going to re-watch this and take notes

  43. wauw thank you for this, I never really knew I was feeling so much resentment towards my partner, I just thought I couldn't let go of the past & didn't know why, but now it all makes sense to me.

  44. 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜😍✨🙏🏻✨💓💐💐💜💕💕💕💕🥳💖🌟🦋💗🥰💜💐💕✨😍✨

  45. I resent my mother for a life time of abuse and then slander, telling people that I’m doing what she has done to me in order to protect her image. She has destroyed my entire family my reputation, pitting everyone against me to hide her wicked behavior. This includes turning my oldest son against me with pure lies. (Which she did after I forgave her for the childhood abuse) it brought it all back into play again and I resented her all over and way more than ever. My oldest son will have nothing to do with his little brother and I. Believing the lies he has been told about me and refusing to even hear my side because he’s been manipulated into believing that I am the one lying. I try to tell myself that the truth will come out eventually and this is all a part of a bigger picture. I see her manipulative ways as how she’s trying to get her unmet needs met. I see her pain and try to have compassion for it, I can see logically how it’s pushed me to be a better person, but I just can’t bring myself to forgive her. The fact that she is still harming people and is being enabled to do so by my entire family and son going along with her lies and deception is what I just can’t seem to accept. I tried speaking my truth and standing up for myself finally last year. I was calm and collected, compassionate and very loving yet firmly told her I would not tolerate it anymore. She proceeded to tell everyone that I was hateful and playing the victim and they all believed her. Not one person in the family has reached out to me in over 4 years to hear my side of things. It hurts. My youngest son has no grandparents or aunts and uncles, no brother. I have been trying to let go and forgive to no avail.. the longer it goes like this without the truth coming out, the more I resent her. If anyone who might read this comment has different perspectives to offer please share, I’d love fresh outsiders perspectives ❤️

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