Hypnotist Bernie’s Exposition – e177 with Precious (anger management)  #hypnosis #hypnotherapy #NLP
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hello welcome to this episode of
hypnotist bernie’s exposition joining us tonight is precious yes how are you doing
I’m good how are you very good very good I’m gonna put that beg yourself where
you’re from I was born and raised here in Boston I’m 30 years old thirty thirty
recently relocating actually to New York so so what makes you want to move to New
York what’s wrong with both nothing’s wrong
with Boston but New York is the land of opportunity that’s true since I’ve been
out there I’ve been getting a lot of gigs a lot of auditions just booked one
that I’m very excited about oh really so um yeah I’m getting my foot in the door
and hopefully you guys will see my face so uh so do you do you go to college
around yeah no I don’t okay so but you grow up around here I did yeah I grew up
in Dorchester actually okay yes so what would you like to work on today um I
would like to work on my anger issues sometimes I tend to be a very angry
person and I can hold grudges okay yeah so tell me a little bit about what do
you mean by angry I just feel like after giving someone a certain amount of
chances you know there’s always so much somebody can take it go reach your
breaking point and you just get extremely upset with people um it
actually happened to me recently with one of my close friends okay I won’t say
her name but I’m just kind of set up with her and you know I didn’t answer
one of her messages I’m sure she doesn’t care if she didn’t take some day but you
know that’s fine but yeah I’m kind of holding a grudge because we were
supposed to do something you know it fell through though yeah so
how does this affect your life it doesn’t really affect my life I mean I’m
gonna do me regardless I’m gonna keep on moving but I love my friends dearly so I
mean not talking to certain people kind of hurts me a little bit and it probably
hurts them that I’m ignoring them because I am lightning but like I said I
love my friends daily and you know everyday communication is something
that’s key that I have between me and my friends like I want to talk to them
every day because I don’t get to see them and so tell me another story when
was the last time this was such a big problem that that you feel that it is
hurting again a family member of mine we’re
actually not on speaking terms as well we had a little falling-out and
basically we both decided to kind of go our separate ways
so to speak which is kind of hard because yeah cuz we’re family you know
like that’s family you just was it oh we were really really really really close
but when we I actually had moved into her house and then there’s no hard what
they say when you move in with somebody you get to see how they really are you
know how they you know so she saw how I was I saw how she was and we just didn’t
mesh well together at all you know each other right yeah and it’s just it’s
disappointing and I know I can come off kind of hard I’m a very sweet person but
I like I heart you I have to protect
myself but she’s probably thinking I don’t care anything like that but like I
care okay and then how do you feel we can really work on her because she’s anything that you say about her is it’s
also a reflection how you feel inside right right so so how does it make you
feel it makes me angry that I let it get to that point could you tell that story
hmm would you tell the story like what what is it that uh is pretty much she’s
someone that kind of took me in she took me in you know under her wing supported
already dreams yeah she’s not right kind of close in age he’s three years older
than me yeah so she took me under her wing
you know she supported me while I was you know living with her trying to
pursue my dreams and you know it was just to a point where it’s like I
couldn’t we couldn’t live under the same space anymore and I just had to leave
and go back home and there was just so many issues and we tried talking about I
tried to tell her how I felt like the things that she says to me how it makes
me feel and then you know she tried to tell me the things I say how it makes
her feel and there was supposed to be some change but I mean people are gonna
remain who they are and they try to change but eventually I feel like people
are always gonna go back to the person that they really are that’s just my
opinion um so we just this is too many differences we can’t agree on anything
she sees it one way I see it the other way and I’m just at a point where I just
couldn’t take it anymore and I just you know started ignoring her you know phone
calls kind of like I’ll talk to you when I’m ready to talk to you and then it
just got to the point where it’s like rich is not gonna speak at all I mean
eventually I would like to speak to her again because again she’s my family
just like my second mom so how long how long ago was this
it was so when we decided to go our separate
that was probably like okay so the reason yeah okay something like it was
from no it was just right out so yeah let’s like both of you may need some
time to yeah I think we just need some time to heal and then eventually just
come back together and just try to talk about it again and be more understanding
right you know plus meeting at Starbucks it’s a lot different eventually the Starbucks meeting have to get each other
we tried yeah and and it’s this the only time where we’re so this what you mean
by anger issue um yeah cuz I can I can be when I say my anger issues like I’m
not you know physical or anything like that
but I can be verbally abusive okay and that needs to change because no one used
to be you know talk to like that I wouldn’t want anyone to talk to me like
that so that’s something that I want to work on then like I’ll say things and I
don’t even mean them but it’s just like you know you may have lose control I do
I lose control okay I do and I’m glad that I’m not you know it doesn’t get
physical but I yeah I intend to be verbally abusive and that’s how often
does that so maybe it’s that more like an issue that you can flip to this
verbally abusive yes okay and how often does that happen but maybe there’s a
more painful that you were abusive or was it more painful that you have lost
control equally okay for me and it’s it’s gotten better throughout the years
but it’s still there and I don’t you know I don’t want to be
like when was the last time the last time again with another like I don’t
have any more friends like I don’t know if it’s me or if it’s been but somebody
needs to get it together I had another friend and I said some
things to her that I probably shouldn’t have said I just need some time to think
about it after it all happened and yeah I think that I was in the wrong so but I
flipped out on her and kind of stooped to a level that I shouldn’t have but
also again I feel like if I’m your friend
I shouldn’t have to sugarcoat anything for you like I’m gonna be real with you
I’m gonna be honest and no I just wanna I wanted to be a better person
okay like I want to help how often does it happen to you that I lashed out like
oh you feel like you have lost control my guide said I’ve I’ve gotten you no
control over it throughout the years so I probably say no I try not to let too
many things bother me nowadays though probably happens maybe once a month
somebody just that one person something they do or something that they say able
to just take me off it I’m just does it do you do this with strangers or just
friends no just just friends okay so so I guess
it happens when they don’t it it sounded so you can correct me if I’m wrong but
uh the sender like when they don’t meet your expectation you feel that you’re
not getting your message across right I feel like down I feel disappointed and I
also feel like when I express these feelings it kind of just gets brushed
under the rug well because it’s like you know
we’re friends like you’ll get over it but it’s like you don’t know how things
affect me just what how I don’t know how things I say or things I do can affect
my friends or family or any or anybody in that matter so people react to things
differently okay so if you if you can like rephrase anger right what would you
use a different word I want to say crazy no appointment just know if you’re
disappointed more yes your anger great an anchor and and the angry is more like
a reaction to the disappoint yes okay definitely and how would you see
yourself difference if everything works out perfectly today like I said I just I
just want to be a different person like I want my inside to match my outside
like how people see me they may not know me but you know I feel like you know a
lot of people think I was a sweet little girl and I am don’t get me wrong I am
but you do one thing or you leave me disappointed it’s just a switch goes off
and them dudes okay you know I just want to run as far away from that person as
possible and just not deal with them okay and but like how would you see
yourself different so at the other day we’re looking for a change right me so
we’re just helping you to articulate how would you how would this change look
like to you what it is it’s just try be happy and be in control okay so maybe we
can put it in a scenario let’s go back to
let’s say you’re with somebody that you’ve been friends for a long time and
you know this conversation is going downhill and and if things were to work
out perfectly how would it beat their friends from the
last time we’d be speaking be be on speaking terms
I don’t know it’s kind of one of those things like I have the answer in my head
but I can’t get it out or it’s kind of one of those like I really don’t know
how would be in someone in that situation okay so it’s more like a being
change okay well as a therapist I’m not supposed to let tell you exactly how to
feel or behave it’s better to use your internal resources to get if you want
but like sometimes we just don’t have the skill to deal with with certain
situations right but it would it be more acceptable if you were to just maybe
walk out of this situation and then come back the next day and then continue the
conversation yes I guess like what would be the word that we use for the time you just or maybe say things like it’s it
looks like we’re not connecting at this moment or at this point in time and I
guess we are going in different directions with the way we think maybe
we could continue this conversation single tomorrow we could articulate a
little bit better right and I’m usually the one that
you know don’t go to bed angry so I like to resolve things right away and maybe
that has been my problem because I have it doesn’t it could just
be like you don’t you don’t have to like finish the conversation right and is it
okay to like not have a resolution what are than a bad one
yes right no no yes we can make it okay we can talk about this tomorrow okay you
know that would be like a would that be a good alternative to yeah okay we can
continue this conversation next week okay or change the venue sometimes if
you’re at the same space sometimes your behavior is triggered okay like if you
keep seeing the same if it’s like it’s like first-year psychology if they keep
looking at the same care and then every time you look at this chair you were
angry and then the next time you’re more than likely to feel that way what you
look at the same environmental stimulus so like if you’re at this and this
person is always angry in a room like a change of environment the more neutral
environment could help right right this is why like like a lot of international
negotiation happens in like a first country in the heat of the moment I mean
nobody’s thinking about that but yeah put it that way so we’re trying to avoid
the heat of the moment reaction right yes so so instead of bowling to the heat
of the moment you say okay let’s why don’t we we talk about this tomorrow all right so what we’re about to do is
hypnosis okay so at no point you would be unconscious
you will just feel like you’re just about to fall asleep if you do find
yourself your ceiling seeing other images or or feeling different images or
hovering different sensation than one I’m telling you that’s fine just relax so I want you to just uncross your legs
if you just cross okay I want you to just hold out your hands like this and
very likely I want you to just press down just as light as possible and as
soon as your palm touches to me I would like you to close your eyes and let your
mind drift oh gee and I would like you to just look up at the center of my palm
writing the counts backwards three two one what a rich number one I would like
you to close your eyes let your mind drift where do I not to close your eyes
before I reach one oh when you close your eyes when your palm is joining we
just like you to imagine yourself on a calm quiet beach you know this calm
quiet beach you can hear the sound of the seagull you can hear the sound of children
playing you can even hear sound of the ocean
wave crashes against the show and you just feel so real it could be a beach we
have been before what somewhere you always wanted to go
free they would imagine yourself on this call of children playing in the background of
the ocean I’m gonna count from 1 to 3 when I reach
number three I would like you to open your eyes to feel great you feel like
you’re not hypnotized but as soon as I say the word sleep you’ll find your eye
just slowly roll to the top of your head the funny eyelids so when was the last
time you were in New York I had my second first but whenever I
pass my hand in front of your eyes we’re never far away from my hand in
front of your eyes that’s becoming so happy so what was this production that
you’re in in New York it’s a silent thriller oh wow yeah which is the silent
part that is the most really yeah yeah production starts next it’s a black and
white or I don’t know yet actually so deeper and deeper each time away from my
hand in front of your eyes who goes ten times deeper into hypnosis filling ten
times a second one two free eyes open no precious we have talked about how you
have issues when it comes to controlling your emotions and as a deeply hypnotized
person your unconscious mind is open to accept all the positive suggestions that
I’m giving you right now the next time you find yourself in a situation where
you’re about to lose control of your temper our emotions
you’ll find yourself quickly calming down quickly able to rationalize and
quickly able to articulate how you feel and think you’ll find yourself stopping
any tendency of getting out of control and you’ll find yourself saying these
words I’m calm relaxed you quickly to control the situation by calming
yourself down and letting the other person know that you want to continue
this conversation with a later time but you have much more collected near the
emotions and in your thinking and in your logic good now I’m going to count
from 1 to 10 when reached number 10 you come back to this room you’ll feel like
all the burden has been lifted from your back and you feel like a changed person
much more in control of your mind and behavior 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
take a deep breath in 8 9 whenever you’re ready well welcome back
this is kinetise Bernie’s with the position for this next week CCTV channel
9 all right we live precious here after
the show are you doing that’s great so tell us how do you feel about hypnosis situations that I have with these people
now and how I’m gonna go about that how I’m gonna attack it without letting me
bring it the best me okay um so um how do you feel as you were going into
hypnosis did you remember your hand was pushing down on my fingers no okay okay
go on what was she talking about moment said that you were talking about oh my
god just felt like the angry side of me the angry part of me was slowly leaving
my body okay I just felt again like a weights been lifted off my shoulders
like I know how to attack these situations now how did you feel as when
you open your eyes and you go back under hypnosis could you describe that
sensation to us it was intense okay opening my eyes for a split second
and then falling back and then open eyes again saying did you feel yourself going
even further I think it does sensation and I went further then further and and
what kind of thoughts do you have in your – you were hypnotized or do you
remember again I just felt like I wanted to be a better person now that you
suggested how I should handle these situations going and have a conversation
okay and how do you feel how do you feel like right now different different how
do you feel different from okay compared to you coming in earlier today and is
this what you were expecting out of hypnosis it was because I didn’t know
what I was gonna do I knew how I felt but I didn’t know what to do with those
feelings okay that’s great would you recommend hypnosis to your friends did
you think you’re worried about hypnosis before you start to show no okay okay
great so you recommend this to your friend that’s great so this is purchase
everybody thank you for coming yeah fully you can come back in a few weeks
and I’ll tell us how you feel

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